Page 60 of That Summer Feeling

“I’ll go next,” Andrew offered. “My favorite memory is right now. Never in a million years did I think we’d get a chance to have a lake night again. None of you know this, but I started this tradition because Mom told me during visitors’ day that I wasn’t being grateful enough.”

“Momsaid that?” Stevie asked.

“I know,” Andrew responded. “That’s how you know it was bad. It was the first year all of us got to come to camp together. You guys were pretty young, so you probably don’t remember, but I hated that you were all here with me. When Mom asked me what I’d done with you guys during the week, I had nothing to tell her. She said I better change that, because I needed to appreciate how lucky I was to have three siblings who were obsessed with me. You were like my littleducklings, trying to follow me everywhere. I’d been wanting to go out onto the lake at night ever since the first year I came to this camp. That year I’d finally planned ahead and packed a big pool float to do it. So I decided to bring you all with me, and that could be the one thing we’d do together. It ended up being the best tradition we ever started.”

“How old were you?” I whispered to Stevie.

“Eight.”

“Four children on a raft in the middle of the night,” I said, louder.

Andrew chuckled. “Listen. No one’s ever accused me of being smart. But everyone loved it so much, we had to keep it up. The fact that we’re all in our thirties now, and we’re out on Lake Carl at midnight again? That’s the greatest gift I’ve ever received. So thank you for this. And thank you, Mom, for reminding me to be a better brother.” He tossed his penny into the water.

I understood exactly why they’d want to come back out on the lake like this. It was reckless and a little terrifying being out on the water in the dark, but it was also full of contentment.

“My favorite memory was the other day at dinner,” Mason offered, not bothering to announce he was going next. “When Stevie was upset aboutyou know who. I know that sounds like a weird pick, but I liked how it felt like if we had to, all of us would’ve started a war for her. It made me proud to be part of this family. We look out for one another. We always have.”

Like all things Mason did, his memory had an exquisite simplicity to it. Succinct and true. He tossed his penny so farout I couldn’t see where it landed, or even hear the soft plop against the water.

“My favorite memory is similar to Mason’s,” Stevie started. “When I found all of you by the water after you’d gone on the Jet Skis. I’d had a real roller coaster of a start to my day, and I was prepared to be in a terrible mood for the rest of it. But I saw you guys hanging out with Garland like you’d known her all your life, all because I told you she was someone important. I watched for a while before I walked over. I couldn’t be upset anymore, seeing all of you like that. I actually thought to myself,No one is luckier than me. And that’s still true. I’m the luckiest person alive with the four of you in my life.”

Four.She’d counted me.

It sparked in my heart. A firecracker eruption that left me in awe of my good fortune.

She underhand tossed her penny into the lake. It arced up past the sly smile of the crescent moon, then plinked down in front of our crane, sinking right beneath us.

“Garland, do you want to offer a memory?” Andrew asked.

I sat up straight, lifting my head from the crook of Stevie’s neck. “Is that okay? I don’t want anyone to be mad.”

“You should do one,” Frank told me.

He was the sibling I’d really been asking, so his approval pushed me forward. “Before I give a memory, I do quickly want to clarify whether it needs to be one that involves all of you?”

Stevie cackled.

“Sorry, I just, I know this is a whole rules-unspoken ritual, but I don’t want to do it wrong,” I said.

“It doesn’t have to involve any of us,” Andrew said. “We just usually do it that way.”

“One time Mason’s favorite memory was getting a blow job from Chloe Hannity,” Stevie announced, which prompted Mason to kick our raft. “Sorry! I just needed Garland to understand we’re not always this earnest out here. That seemed like the fastest way to illustrate the point.”

I let the beat between them die before I spoke. It helped to have a little more time. How could I possibly limit this week to one memory?

“Dancing at the mixer with Stevie,” I said, throwing it out before I could overthink how much I should tell her siblings. “I learned a lot about myself that night. And I think when I look back on this weekend, I’m always gonna return to Stevie and me under the disco ball.”

She leaned back into me as I spoke, tilting her head up so her curls brushed my collarbone. I held my penny over the water and dropped it straight down. My first contribution to lake night. Proof of my existence.

Silence blanketed us again. We floated, lazy on the lake, lost to time. Eventually our rafts made their way to shore again, spitting us out in front of the main buildings.

“Whoa. We never land over here,” Mason commented as he unlinked our rafts.

Andrew left to retrieve our shoes from the starting point.

Frank went into Mason’s backpack and pulled out a knife. “We pop the rafts,” he told me.

“That’s sad,” I said, looking at our sweet crane friend.