Page 86 of Love Scenes

“Here’s the proof you wanted,” he tells me, gesturing to the air. “That all of this is a fairy tale. We had a nice stretch, but it was nothing more than two costars caught up in the story they were telling.” He takes a long pause. “We don’t know each other at all.”

Joseph Donovan remains the only person capable of outpacing me. In all ways. I lost to him playing my own game, and we both know it.

He opens the trailer door for me. “I don’t think we’re in need of any rehearsing today,” he says. “I’ll see you out there.”

In stunned silence, I take his cue and exit.

23

Mom has tears in her eyes, looking over Elise and Vera’s apartment, all of it packed up into boxes. We saved the last scene of the movie for the last day on set, and there’s a tangible bittersweetness to the mood here, knowing that these characters are leaving this place behind right as we are, all of us heading into new unknowns.

Mom squeezes my side and plants one quick kiss on my temple. “Thank you for doing this. I know I didn’t make it easy.”

“That’s an understatement,” I quip.

“It’s been a long road, Sloane. Lots of therapy. And I still haven’t learned how to stop myself from giving out the same treatment I got.”

I watch the words come out of her mouth, and I still can’t believe she’s said it. Ultimately they are only words, and hopefully her actions start to match up, but her admitting this much is still better than any empty inspirational platitude she’s ever spouted.

She wipes her tears, then shakes it off. “Whew. I need a smoke.” When I give her a disapproving glare, she throws her hands up.“I know, I know. I’m quitting after this. You try managing your children on a set and tell me it doesn’t make you wanna set your lungs on fire. Okay?”

She excuses herself to vape, and it’s only me, basking in a rare reflective quiet.

This is it, I think as if narrating it for Elise and for myself.Time to let go.

This movie has held a magic to it I never could have anticipated. Bigger than anything I ever imagined as a kid, because for all its magnitude—the millions of dollars spent, dozens and dozens of crew members—it’s also felt like a secret. A corner of the world only the lucky few of us got to know about, right here on a studio lot of all places. No matter what happens from here on out, for the first time in my professional career, I am proud of what I’ve done, without expectations.

Whether we sink or we sail, we made it to the end. In spite of it all.

Someone places a hand on my shoulder. For a moment, I allow myself to hope it’s Joe, having the same end-of-production feelings as I am. Contemplative and emotional, ready to surrender. It’s going to be so painful otherwise, shooting a happily ever after when we don’t even speak between takes.

Guy stands behind me instead, wistful, smirking like he’s known all of this would happen in the exact way it has. This is how we started this production. And this is how we will end it.

“The thrill,” he tells me. “It never gets old. Not if you’ve done it right.”

I half laugh. “I definitely haven’t always done it right.”

“That’s okay. Neither have I. I got there eventually, and I never looked back.”

“All I do is look back,” I admit. It’s hard not to mimic the wayGuy speaks. Like each sentence is its own Hemingway baby shoes story.

“My dear, don’t get me wrong. The rearview has a spectacular shine. Without it, you’d never know which way to go next.” He puts a hand on his heart. “The trick is to pack up the necessary things and take them along. Then everything you need is right beside you.” From his pocket he digs out a small box and hands it to me. “A wrap gift for you. From your mother and me.”

I open it and find an antique-looking gold chain bracelet with a delicate orange chrysanthemum painted onto a porcelain plate at the center.

“Flip it over,” Guy says.

The other side of the flower is backed with gold. There’s an inscription that readsIt’s always been you.Calvin’s line to Elise, right before he says he loves her. What Joe said right before he told me he loved me.

I suck back a breath of surprise, the wind knocked out of me. “Thank you.”

“I’ve said it once, I will say it again,” Guy starts. “This part was always meant to be yours. Thank you for playing it as you have.”

“It’s been my honor.”

“The honor is all mine, my dear.” Guy bows to me. “You made her real.”

Acting out thesefinal scenes is as easy as it is hard. Tapping into the sadness requires no effort. It’s right on the surface for all of us. Even Joe’s eyes glisten with tears every time we shoot Calvin and Elise carrying their belongings out of their respective homes and meeting in the hallway.