Page 132 of Don't Be in Love

They were holding cards. For me.

She came all the way here,for me.

My entire nervous system bubbled with unexpected, unfathomable, joy. I couldn’t contain the tears springing to my eyes as they applauded and blew me kisses.

I raised my hand and waved. I could only imagine how I looked: a smile that made my cheeks puffy, and watery eyes that made it look like I was holding in a sneeze.

They waved their arms, pointing to the chair, making me realize I should probably sit down.

As I turned into my row and sat, I couldn’t help but watch them for the entire ceremony, trying to confirm it wasn’t a hallucination or a trick of the light.

Watching them, I realized exactly what it must’ve felt like to have a scrapbook made for you. Because I was looking at one in motion.

Maybe life wasn’t all about protecting yourself and trying to push away pain.

Maybe forgetting was all about forwardness. To remain steady on the path forward while trying to pick up as many stones filled with gratitude and joy and hope so that the resentment that fueled the lack of forgiveness didn’t overwhelm the present.

There was something beautiful about falling in love with the uncertainty of life.

Marty’s Bagel Shop

2 Ivy Lane, New York, NY 10014

Marty Matthews

Hi Marty,

I didn’t forget to write you, I promise! However, it is very likely you’ve forgotten all about me by now, seeing as you gave me your list back in October … What can I say? I don’t like to send an update until I’m happy with the result.

I can confirm that I completed everything on your list: went on the London Eye (begrudgingly), sent a postcard back home (reluctantly), tried something new (painting!), got a shirt with a UK flag on it (hand-me-down), used a telephone booth (that’s a story for a different time), and kissed a Brit!

Ironically, the Brit part turned into a boyfriend! You’d like him a lot. Maybe he could draw you a new logo! Not that you need a new one …

To be honest, I thought I’d never finish the list. But looking back on it now, I have so much more to do here. Just last week I accepted a job offer in Edinburgh for the summer and I’m over the moon about it.Finally, all those late nights spent studying that you got stuck hearing about paid off. I’ve already started planning some weekends to take the train back to London to see everyone. Even my book club is going to visit in July and then my aunt in August.

I simply cannot wait. There’s so much to look forward to.

Currently, I’m sitting at my desk, writing you this letter, while 1. the sun comes through my balcony, warming my face, 2. the half-packed suitcase at my feet taunts me, and 3. my boyfriend sits on the balcony painting, looking up every few minutes.

The two of us are going to visit his sister Jasmine in France for a few days before I start my new job. I’m beyond excited, and I’ll definitely be making a new list.

Apologies again for the long awaited follow-up!

Love,

Adelaide

The First Night in France

I sat on the windowsill of the fire escape and let the moonlight soak my face. The colorful buildings outside our window (many which we explored with Jasmine today) were no longer eccentric pastels, but instead, grays and blues under the dark sky. Every few minutes, a car would whiz by on the street below and interrupt the chatter of friends clinking their wine glasses in the restaurants’ waterfront seating.

“It’s beautiful here,” I hummed, closing my eyes.

“It is. France looks good on you,” Dorian said, in the middle of undressing.

“You’re just saying that so I’ll give you the last bite of my croque monsieur.” I waved the European equivalent to a grilled ham and cheese.

“How dare you accuse me of such things,” he countered.