Page 125 of Devil Inside

Am I really going to go through with this?This is my decision. I chose to be here. So I take a breath and set foot inside.Abandon all hope ye who enter this apartment...

It’s warmer than I expect. The faint crackle of static spills out from a set of speakers. A needle burrows into the groove. The hiss and pop of the record fills the silence, and I almost expect to turn the corner and find a bonfire in the center of the living room.

Instead, I find her. Lilith and...

Her. Her host. This body before me. This woman, Cara, is more than that. She’s a human being. What does she have to say about all this? What control does she have?

Votive candles lap at the living room. Lilith’s turned the place into a church, wax melting everywhere. Pale tallow dribbles over the hardwood floor, puddling and hardening.

Is this all for me?

There’s a couch. A chair sits in the center of the room. The walls are bare, mostly, save for some framed artwork. Posters for Godard films. Truffaut’sThe400 Blows.

I catch a glimpse of who Lilith’s host is. Her passions. Hersense of identity. This isn’t Lilith. It’s someone else. Her host has a life. I need to honor that. Respect that.

Don’t I?

There’s a bottle of Merlot open and breathing on the coffee table. Two glasses, empty, waiting for their wine.

I take the couch while Lilith sits in the chair. I need some distance. Just for now. Until I can understand all this. Hear what her host has to say.

Here we are, Lilith, me—and her host—staring each other down.

Who’s on the other side of those eyes? I can’t help but wonder if her host is staring back, pleading for help. Begging to break free. I need to know. Understand how this works.

“What now?” Lilith asks.

“We talk.”

“Talk.”

“Not you. Her.”

“Her.”It’s hard to say for certain, but for a moment, I can’t help but pick up a shard of glass in her voice. She buries it, but it almost sounds like she’s jealous. Of her host?

That’s the hardest part about all of this. I have to recognize there’s two of them.

The demon within, and the host.

All this time, I’ve been speaking to Lilith, but not the person whose body she’s embedded in. I’m addressing Lilith, not the skin. The human being she’s residing in.

What’s the thing they always say?I want you to love me for what’s inside...

Yeah, well, I’d say we’re putting that fucking theory to the test right about now.

I’ve been sleeping with the devil. A goddamn demon. She could be inside anybody—

any body

—at any time, hopping from one host to the next and neversettling down. I’ve sensed her before, haven’t I? Felt her following me, no matter whose body she’s hiding in?

So... who am I falling for?

“Thirsty?” Lilith motions to the bottle of wine open before us.

“Not just yet.”

“Say when.”