Page 61 of Counting the Days

“Okay, I hope smelling all those dirty diapers made you hungry,” Rhea said as she led him to another sign that read:Guess the Baby Food!

“Now we get to taste all this mysterious baby food and write down what we think it is.”

“Why?”

Rhea laughed. “You’re asking the wrong question, have you not been to many baby showers?”

Danny confessed that most of the baby showers in his orbit were for women only.

“Well, my friends are modern. They always do coed, so men get to do all thispointless bullshittoo.” Rhea chuckled as if she was joking, while a possible flash of concern moved across Danny’s face.

“I’m totally kidding, I’m having a great time, Ilovebaby showers,” Rhea said, trying to remove the expression on Danny’s face.

“Clearly,” he said, and they looked into each other’s eyes, each seemingly daring the other to say what they were really feeling.

Rhea did not take him up on the dare and began spooning unappetizing goo from various baby food jars onto her plate, and said, “We can play this one together if you want.”

“Yes, please. You’re a pro, I don’t wanna compete with you.”

“That’s wise, ’cause I’d crush you.”

They slowly sampled each color of mashed food while discussing the flavor, the mouthfeel, and the finish.

“This one starts, like, almost mango…but then I’m getting a hint of pineapple?” Danny said.

Rhea tasted it and immediately said, “That’s apple banana strawberry.”

“Well, I trust your baby food palate more than mine.” Danny tried another and gagged. “I don’t even know—it tastes like dog shit.”

Rhea tasted it. “That’s ham and gravy.”

“You’ve been to way too many baby showers.”

“Tell me about it,” she said with a touch of frustration in her voice. She covered it with an excited gasp as she looked out the window. “Oooh, let’s go outside and make stuff!”

She dragged Danny out the back door. Zoe was in the yard, sharply addressing a group of children, including her own daughter and Chichi, as they sat at an arts and crafts table.

“…If you draw on the tablecloth again, I will kill you—” Zoe looked up at Rhea and her boyfriend. “Well, hello there…. So, this is the famous Danny Beckett? I’ve hearda lotof very good things about you.”

Rhea wished Zoe would play it cool and pretend like Rhea had not been continuously talking about Danny for months, but for that to occur, Zoe would need to have been born with human instincts. Rhea told Zoe they wanted to decorate a onesie, and Zoe set them up with seats at the table in front of two white onesies, a cup of markers, and several tubes of paint.

“May the best man win,” Rhea said.

“Oh, this is also a competition?” Danny asked.

“Usually, the mommy will select her favorite onesie at the end of the shower. I mean, that’s happened at, like, eighteen of the showers I’ve been to anyway.”

“Well, then…prepare to die, Darby.”

“Not to freak you out, but I’ve won like ten times.”

“What’d you win?”

“Usually a candle, but I’m not in it for the candles, I’m in itfor the glory…. Thank you for coming with me, by the way. Everyone loves you.” She was genuinely starting to feel a bit better from the combination of feigned happiness and just being around Danny.

“It’s my pleasure. Truly. I like your friends.”

He put his arm around her and kissed the top of her head. She detected a hint ofI’m sorry they all had maternity shoots and you’ll never have onein his embrace, but she was probably just being paranoid.