Page 41 of Judge of Saints and Sinners

Justine only took a moment to read into the posture. “Oh my God, is the deal done?”

My lips curled in a smile, “You’re not that lucky. Still binding, for as long as you live.”

I paused as Justine wrapped her arms around her middle, rubbing her own skin a little. “You’re cold.” Self-hate crept into my awareness. How long had she been chilled like this? I stepped forward. “Let’s get you home.”

Justine stepped away from me as she suspiciously looked up at me. “How do I know any of this is real? The deal, I could maybe get around that. But this, this is something else altogether.”

My mind was a painful blur, my power lapped against the will of my control, and I could feel my temper rising in my throat. Because even though I’d succeeded, I’d met my soul bound, I had kept her safe, why was I so deeply unhappy now that I knew who I was again?

I had known losing track of my memories had been a real possibility when I breached the boundary to find her. But I hadn't expected to be so pissed about it once I was myself again.

Fuck, I was confused.

“I’m not sure what to say. I just needed to tell you that…what just happened”—I gestured between the two of us—“cannot happen again. It’s too dangerous.”

The way her body stiffened when I placed a hand at the small of her back instantly cooled my temper and confused me even further. Distance. We needed distance. Too bad I was unable to leave her side for more than a few hours without the bond going crazy.

We were stuck in this loop, and I had no idea what to do. Until this deal released us, the bond was only going to grow. It would make my power grow even faster. The only thing short of having my soul back that would make me whole was to be with her.

Justine laughed, the sound hollow, “I can’t believe that I kissed you before I even knew your real name. Oh my God, I slept with you before I even knew your name. You’ve been my roommate for all of three days, and I barely know anything about you.”

“You know plenty.” I knew my words were cold to her, but again, my power was leaping around in my chest.

I hummed under my breath, my eyes sweeping the perimeter of her building as we entered. Again, I couldn't tell if something had actually changed or if my senses were just firing at an abnormally high rate. But something felt different.

We started towards the front steps, when Justine stopped, turning to me and tucking a hair behind her ears. I was struck with the sudden overwhelming need to kiss her again. To taste her and mold our bodies together. Forget the consequences.

Oh Father Hades, that kiss. My lips tingled and heated at the thought of it. I wanted to do it again, to press into her, to find all the spots on her pretty little body that made her quiver and moan. I would savor and enjoy every single little noise I could wring from her.

I followed her up the stairs, trying to measure my steps. I didn’t want to be too close in case my power bloomed again, but I couldn't seem to make myself stay back any farther either. Was this how Arafel had felt? This needs to be close. It was so different from my experience with my first soul bound that my mind could barely wrap itself around it.

Then again, it was different because she was different. Anna had been kindness personified. Justine was funny and awkward and generous, even when she was so far from comfortable herself.

She was good. Like Anna was.

I was meant to be with someone good, and the idea that my soul had managed to exist within two of the best souls I’d ever had the pleasure of knowing made me have hope for myself. Maybe someday, when I was whole again, I would have a chance at being the son I wanted to be, the brother they needed me to be. The ruler I was destined to be. Not the shell of a male who only understood judgment and anger.

We finally reached the apartment and went inside. I watched her make us some packaged noodles, my fingers cooling even in the early fall weather. Justine must’ve noticed me, because her face was apologetic as she handed me the soup.

“Sorry. The heating in here is a little nuts. I’ll get out an extra blanket tonight.”

My belly tightened. Right, for the night spent together on her sad little mattress. While it hadn’t bothered me before to share this space, suddenly everything felt too close. Maybe it was because of how my cock twitched and ached in my sweatpants just imagining us curled together. I hadn’t felt desire of any sort for so long, I almost mistook it for my power once again.

I turned to the window, pretending to stare out into the dark night, hiding my reaction to her words. “We’ll make it work.”

Fuck. My family. I knew that coming through the barrier would be hard for just about anyone. I’d already used Arafel’s power in a way that would surely make my father set me on fire just for trying. But I also knew that my father would be looking for me soon. The Brotherhood reported on all things coming and going in the Underworld, and there was no way that Peter had been able to keep up with the soul sorting without me.

I cocked my head, deep in thought. Unless my power here also directly correlated to what was happening in the Underworld. Perhaps I could make the jump through the boundary. I looked at Justine. I wasn’t ready yet though. She still had my soul, And I wasn't about to throw my memories away again trying to pass to the Underworld. Not when the new ones were so sweet and somehow more dear to me.

“What would you want to know?”

Justine looked confused, “About what?”

“About me.”

An evil grinned pulled at her pretty lips. “Everything.”

I rolled my eyes at her. “I’m hundreds of years old, we don’t having time for that.”