Page 198 of Own It

Josias chuckled somewhat fraudulently, letting me know there was a problem of some sort, just not one that would cause for grave concern.

“I need ya help, Day.” He started to pace, ombre honey-blond locs swinging with every step. “It’s bad.”

“What is it?” I inquired alarmingly.

“It’s Kasia. I don’ did everything I can think of, and she ain’t budging. I’m panicking, fam.”

“Did everything?” I was doubtful. I’d talked to Kasia daily via text and sometimes on the phone at night, and she hadn’t mentioned this ‘everything’ Josias was doing, which meant it wasn’t shit but small stuff if that.

“I mean, . . . yeah. I cut Tarin off—sexually and emotionally—brought her flowers, and professed my love to her.”

“Okay.” I sat down. “Isn’t that what you always do? And every time in the past, it’s been a lie?”

He sucked his teeth, halting his pacing.

“I mean, yeah, but I ain’t lying this time.”

“Okay, well she doesn’t know that.”

“She act like she don’t even care to know!”

“You have to give her time, Jojo. Maybe after a while of you proving yourself, she will start to bend some, but what the hell am I supposed to do?”

“Talk to her. Tell her I’m a good nigga and some mo’ shit. Talk a nigga up!” His brows furrowed, making me chuckle and him smack his lips in irritation.

“I am not some prophet, Josias. You have to be patient and continue on the straight and narrow road if you want her to come back to you. There is no cheat code to this.”

“I’m scared to be patient, man.” He sat on the couch in my office, digging into his eyes with his palms. “She like that cornball ass nigga, and she might fuck around and marry his ass or something if I’m too patient.”

“I didn’t say go MIA. I said be chill. You can still do things to show her you love her and are serious. You don’t need to completely fall back. But don’t try to steamroll her or make her be back with you. Be the mature, considerate man I know you can be, right?”

He picked his head up to lock eyes with me before nodding somberly.

“Fuck.”

“First accept that your own actions put you in this position, not Kasia. Had you been one hundred from the beginning, you wouldn’t even be going through this. Unfortunately, though, bro, your word has no value in this moment, so you have to show up with actions but not too much to where you are overbearing or trying to control her decisions. Had you been right, she wouldn’t be laid up with Darron.”

“Fuck!” He shot up from the couch, startling me slightly. “They been laying up? You saw ’em?”

“Josias, get the hell out.” I ascended as well, guiding his big ass out of my office.

Once he was gone, I pulled my phone from my back pocket to send a text.

Me: Girl your BD is sick!

Kasia: Good.

I laughed at her message, shaking my head in amusement. That was what his ass got.

TWENTY-SIX

téa

Palming my stomach as I lay on the examination table, all kinds of thoughts flew through my mind like a whirlwind. My stomach was a little larger now, making everything so surreal.

In the past, whenever I thought of becoming a mother, I told myself I wouldn’t let it come to fruition. I figured if I ever fell pregnant—something I worked hard to prevent—I would abort it at the first sign. And when I found out I was pregnant by Zaire, that was exactly what I’d planned to do, but something wouldn’t allow me to make that appointment.

I knew Zaire was special from the first time I met him, and the thought of bringing someone into the world that was kin to him made me feel special too. Not to mention I had no family nor friends and often got lonely in the little free time I did have.