Page 60 of Back to Square One

Aaand the tears were back, closing off her throat so all she could do was nod.

“I thought so.” Her mom lifted their hands and brought them to her lips. She kissed Rowan’s knuckles. “Then, my girl, you shove your way in. You muscle past her protests, and you help. In any way you can. You help. And you stay. She’s gonna lose people. It happens. They’ll get tired. They’ll realize it’s too much for them to see her ill. You stay.” She tightened her grip on Rowan’s hand. “Don’t do this if you don’t think you can handle it, though. Don’t show up and then give up on her.”

“I can handle it.”

Her mom’s smile was proud. “I know you can. You have the biggest heart of anybody I know.”

“What if…” Rowan had to clear her throat and try again, because this was the thing, wasn’t it? “What if it happens again? What if she devastates me again?”

“Sweetie, I’m not saying hand over your heart to her. I’m saying simply…be her friend. Yeah?”

Of any predictions she could’ve made about that Saturday, Rowan would never have chosen this one. The visit from Evie, the story of her mom’s best friend, a woman she only remembered from photos, and the sudden determination that Evie wasn’t going to go through this sickness on her own. None of it was on her bingo card for the day. Not a single thing.

She turned and pulled her mother into a hug. “Thank you,” she whispered into her hair, and she felt her mom’s grip tighten.

“You’re welcome,” her mother said back. “Think about all of it, be sure of your intentions, and then talk to her.” They parted, and her mom reached out and tucked a lock of Rowan’s hair behind her ear.

“I don’t have to. I know what I want to do. I want to help her.” She gave a sardonic chuckle. “I feel like I’m about to go back in time a little bit.”

Her mom smiled. “I bet it feels kind of like that, huh? Like going back to square one?” At Rowan’s nod, she added, “You’re a good person, Rowan, with a big, kind, generous heart.”

Rowan smiled back at her. “You should meet my mom.”

Evie had moved during the nearly three years since their breakup, and Rowan expected she might have to beg Stevie to give her the new address.

That wasn’t the case at all. Stevie had handed it over happily, looking like she had a thousand things to say but saying none of them. She simply smiled and gave Rowan a very tight hug.

Now Rowan parked her car outside the cute little one-story patio home on the east side of town and sat there. The housing development was new, the houses small but modern looking. Evie’s had an open front porch with a white rocking chair and a couple of pots with pink and purple petunias spilling over the rims. Evie’s favorites. She planted pots of petunias every year, always pink and purple, and it was kind of nice to see some things didn’t change.

It was Monday at three o’clock in the afternoon. Rowan was still only working part-time for the moment, doctor’s orders, so she’d finished up by one, run to the store, and now here she was. She hadn’t called or texted, hadn’t warned Evie she was coming. She didn’t think she needed to. She did, however, have a moment of panic wondering if Claire would be there, but the only car in the driveway was Evie’s Honda, so that was a relief.

“You’re not doing any good sitting here,” she whispered aloud into the empty car, then reached for the door handle and got out.

From her trunk, she grabbed two grocery bags, then headed up the sidewalk in the center of the tiny front lawn. The floor of the porch was made of slats of wood painted a cool gray, and it had a white railing that ran around the whole thing, encasing it. It was cozy and inviting, and part of her wanted to take a seat in the rocking chair and rock the rest of the afternoon away. She set a bag down and rang the doorbell.

Her nerves jangled like she was about to ask a girl to the prom, and she shook out her hand and cleared her throat as she waited.

Evie’s surprise was all over her face when she pulled the door open. “Rowan. Hi.”

“Hi.” And then the words left, and the two of them stood there for a beat or two, just looking at each other.

Finally, Evie’s gaze drifted to the grocery bags, and she looked back up at Rowan with a question in her eyes.

“I…brought some stuff,” Rowan said in explanation, adding a half shrug. “Can I come in?”

Evie blinked several times and moved aside. “Oh my God. I’m so rude. Of course you can. Come in, come in.”

Rowan stepped inside the entryway that opened right into the living room. She recognized the muted blue couch with the corner piece that was a lounge and Evie’s favorite spot. That was clearly still true, as the pillow there was flattened and a light blanket was in a pile at the foot. Rowan grinned.

“What are you smiling at?” Evie asked.

“I’m smiling because it’s the end of August and still in the eighties outside, but the air-conditioning always makes us use a blanket on the couch. I do it too.”

“I know you do.” Evie smiled back at her, and they had a quick moment of connection.

The floor was oak hardwood with a large area rug in the center of the room. A small gas fireplace took up one wall, shelves on either side of it. A television was mounted above it.

Rowan held up the bags. “I brought you some stuff I thought you might like.”