Page 13 of Back to Square One

Wouldn’t she?

Maybe not, if she thought she’d be protecting Rowan from pain or more heartache.

She took in a deep breath and willed her brain to give her a fucking break. It was bad enough that there was so much of her life she couldn’t remember. Now she was to be treated to the endless wondering about Evie and her current situation. And of course, after the wondering came the picturing, which was the worst part of all. She had trouble making Evie and Claire into a couple, honestly, but her mind certainly gave it a try. She might not remember their breakup that well, but she did remember Evie. Her body, long and lean, her gorgeously wide smile, that thick, dark hair that Rowan used to love filling her hands with…

“Ugh!” She clamped her hands over her eyes in a lame attempt to erase the vision of a gloriously naked Evie in her head.

Evie had always said that Claire wasn’t her type—brash, kind of judgmental, a little bossy. But they’d been friends since middle school, and Claire would do anything for Evie. Rowan knew it and so did Evie.

But that was then. What if they were together now?

What if it was new?

“God, if I hear them having sex next door, I will jump off this balcony,” she whispered into the empty room.

Chapter Four

Sunday was overcast, and the perfect day to check out the local wineries. Rowan lay in her bed, awake, for a long time that morning, just watching clouds the color of a heating duct move slowly across the sky outside her windows.

She hadn’t heard Evie and Claire come up to bed last night. Hell, she hadn’t heard anything, and for that, she was eternally grateful. That was something new about her sleep: when she slept, she was out. It was likely a side effect of her medication, but she slept more deeply now than she ever had in her life, which was honestly a bit disconcerting, considering she’d always been a light sleeper. Luckily, she wouldn’t be on her meds forever, and she hoped to get back to her normal, wake-up-three-or-four-times-a-night-to-pee sleep schedule, if only to feel like herself again.

Justine was clearly up and at ’em, judging by the scents of the cooking breakfast. Bacon again, plus what smelled like peppers and onions. Omelettes, perhaps? Her mouth watered, and that was enough to get her out of bed and moving.

A quick shower later, Rowan was dressed and headed downstairs, where she found Justine, Jazzy, and Evie sitting around the table, eating breakfast and sipping coffee.

“Morning, sunshine,” Justine said as she saw Rowan. “Sleep okay?”

“Like a baby,” Rowan said, heading for the coffeepot.

“I never understood that phrase,” Jazzy said. “I mean, babies are notorious for not sleeping, right? So it doesn’t make any sense. I would think maybe if you woke up crying several times and had to have your diaper changed or be rocked back to sleep, then you slept like a baby.”

Evie laughed, light and almost musical, and the sound went in Rowan’s ear, down into her rib cage, and wrapped around her heart. Sat there like it owned the place. She swallowed hard as she stirred her coffee.

“Where is everybody?” Rowan asked as she turned and leaned against the counter, holding her mug in both hands.

“On the boat,” Justine said. “Lizzie wanted to fish, so Stevie, Claire, and Becca went with her.” She glanced at her watch. “They’ll be back soon.” She turned to look at Rowan. “You up for wine today?”

“Absolutely.” Rowan gave her a nod.

“I think it might just be the four of us.” Justine pushed up from her chair and brought her plate to the sink, as Jazzy and Evie had their own conversation Rowan couldn’t quite hear. “I know Becca wants to tube again and Claire said she’d like to go along, so Lizzie’s gonna take them. Stevie wants to take out a kayak.” She glanced out the window at the still overcast sky. “Not really a day I want to be on the water, so…” Justine lowered her voice then. “You gonna be okay with it just being us?”

She was referring to being around Evie in a smaller group, and what was Rowan going to say? No? How petty would that look?

“Of course,” she said, forcing a smile. “I’m good. No worries.”

“Great.” Justine’s voice held a tint of relief. “Want me to whip you up an omelette? You should eat something hearty if you’re gonna sip wine all day.”

Once she’d gotten downstairs to see she’d missed out on omelettes, she’d planned to just have a banana or some yogurt. But despite not wanting to send Justine back into the kitchen to cook yet another breakfast, she’d made a valid point about eating something more substantial, so she nodded after all, and Justine got to work.

Rowan glanced up to find Evie looking at her, and some things never changed because Rowan felt her heart skip a beat in her chest, the way it always had in that situation. Meeting Evie’s big brown eyes had always had that effect on her, and she shifted her gaze quickly back to Justine. “Do I have time to take a walk down to the water?”

With a nod, Justine said, “I need about fifteen minutes.”

“Be right back.” Without looking at Evie again, Rowan took her coffee with her and headed out the door. The grass was still slightly damp from the morning dew, but things were quiet as she headed down the stairs to the dock. Despite the gray skies, the air was warm and humid. Like glass, the surface of the lake shimmered, even without any sunshine to bounce off it, and Rowan walked all the way to the end of the dock to stand.

A big, slow inhale filled her lungs with fresh air, and she held it for several seconds before letting it out. In her back pocket, her phone buzzed, and she pulled it out to see a text from her mother.

Going okay?