Page 95 of Spar of Hearts

Like a monster.

His throat went dry. Divine Almighty. How long had he tried to impress the image of privilege and ignorance on Anya—swore she didn’t understand the plight of his people?

But Anya wasn’t a monster. She was…Anya. And he was sure she must have been just as intelligent as a child as she was now. Why wouldn’t they have talked to her? Or spent time with her? What harm could come if one of them had been with her all the time during the full moon?

Even if it was a locked room, at least she wouldn’t have been alone.

Anya sniffed and wiped her eyes on her sleeve. “You’re wondering why they didn’t just stay with me, right?” A bitter laugh escaped her. “They couldn’t stand being around me like that.”

“That can’t be—”

“‘Shift back into the little girl we love. Now,’” Anya said with a cruel air that made his heart ache for her. “That’s what Mother told me. That was the moment I learned their love was just a mask. Conditional. Fake. Able to be ripped away the instant you reveal your true self.” She turned to Roderick, eyes misty with tears. “Because if the woman who held me and sang me to sleep could starve me into submission the next day without a second glance…I can’t believe real, unconditional love is possible from anyone.”

I can.

Roderick swallowed back the words. Anya was being vulnerable with him. Any declaration now would seem like exactly what the self-absorbed man she said he was would do. But he meant it. He really, truly meant it. Strip away her title, her wealth, even her beauty, and Anya was still everything he could ever want and more.

“Stars, I’m really throwing myself a pity party, aren’t I? Who am I to complain to you? You’ve endured so much worse, I should just—”

She yelped with surprise as he slid her on to his lap. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and hugged her close, admiring the shine of her golden hair as the flames dimmed into embers before them.

“Your pain is real. Don’t compare it to anyone else’s. I’ve—I’ve made that mistake before. I’ve made a lot of mistakes.”

“Like jumping in after me?”

“No. That’s not one of them. I’d do it again. I’d do anything for you, Anya, Princess, Queen, or not. I hope you know that.”

His pulse kicked up as Anya turned around and buried her face in his shirt.

“It…mmph…me.”

“What?”

“Mmph…was…me.”

What on earth was she saying? What he’d give for the ability to poke into her mind right now.

“What?”

“Never mind.” Anya pushed away from his chest.

“I think you need some sleep.” He brushed his fingers through her hair, coming to rest on her jaw line. She closed her eyes and leaned into his touch, almost savoring it—like he would vanish without a moment’s notice.

But nothing could make that happen.

She finally yawned, then opened her eyes, bleary with fatigue. “All right. Thank you for building a shelter.”

Roderick stayed seated by the fire, listening to the shift of fir boughs and leaves as Anya settled into the lean-to.

“Roderick?”

“Yes?”

“You’re going to sleep under here too, right?”

“Yes.”

No.