Page 77 of Certified To Handle You 2

I kissed her shoulder again and held her tighter, but she ain’t relax into me. Her body stayed stiff under my arm, and the more she ignored me, the harder it got to keep my own frustration from comin’ out.

I was tryna protect her, and somehow that protection was makin’ her feel rejected.

That wasn’t what I wanted. I wanted to explain that every time I thought about puttin’ my dick inside her, I remembered that my desire had helped put her in that hospital. I wanted to tell her the doctor clearin’ her body ain’t clear my mind, and I ain’t know how to touch her without wonderin’ if I was bein’ selfish again.

Instead, I laid here holdin’ her while none of that came out.

After another minute of her givin’ me nothin’, I sighed and ran my hand down my face. I let her go before rollin’ back to my side of the bed ‘cause I could feel myself gettin’ irritated, and the last thing I wanted was to say somethin’ wrong to a woman who was already dealin’ with more than she knew how to explain.

Pluto stayed on her side, and I stayed on mine with our backs turned toward each other. There wasn’t much space between us, but it felt like more than the whole bed could hold.

I stared toward the dark wall while my wife laid behind me, and my dick was completely soft now.

It ain’t have nothin’ to do with not wantin’ her. I wanted Pluto more than I wanted anybody or anything in this world, butwantin’ her had started scarin’ the fuck out of me ‘cause I knew what it had almost cost us.

I ain’t know how to make her understand that I wasn’t stayin’ away ‘cause she had changed or ‘cause I ain’t see her the same. I was stayin’ away ‘cause she was still the most important thing in my life, and I couldn’t survive bein’ responsible for nothin’ else happenin’ to her.

The problem was, Pluto ain’t know none of that ‘cause I ain’t really know how to bring it up without reopenin’ the wound.

All she knew was her husband stopped touchin’ her the way he used to, and now she was layin’ beside me feelin’ unwanted while I was layin’ here scared to love her the way I always had.

That realization sat with me as I stared into the dark, but I still ain’t turn around. I could hear Pluto breathin’ behind me, and I knew from the way she kept shiftin’ that she wasn’t asleep either.

Neither one of us said nothin’ else, and eventually the room went quiet while we stayed on opposite sides of the same hurt, both of us too deep in our own heads to reach back for each other.

THE NEXT DAY…

Today, I had been movin’ around from the time I opened my eyes, and by the time the sun started goin’ down, I was ready to get the fuck from around everybody and enjoy myself for a minute.

Cloud 9 had been packed damn near all day, and I had spent most of my time movin’ between the kitchen, the office, and the front of the restaurant makin’ sure shit was runnin’ the way I wanted it to run. I ain’t have to be there every second for the place to move, but I still liked puttin’ my eyes on everything ‘cause niggas got lazy when they got too comfortable.

One minute I was talkin’ to the chef about some plates comin’ out wrong, and the next minute I was on the phone with one of my dispensary managers ‘cause somebody had fucked up inventory numbers and thought I wasn’t gon’ notice.

By the time the restaurant started clearin’ out, I had already counted the money twice and packed most of it inside a black duffel bag.

I came out the office with that bitch in my hand and walked through the back of the restaurant while everybody moved around cleanin’ up.

A few people spoke when they saw me, and I nodded without stoppin’ ‘cause I was ready to go home, take a shower, and chill.

Soon as I stepped outside, my phone started ringin’ in my pocket. I shifted the duffel bag into my other hand and pulled my phone out while I headed toward my truck.

“Wussup?” I answered.

“What you on tonight?” Kay’Lo asked.

“I’m just leavin’ Cloud 9. What you on?”

“I’m tryna hit Drahma Town. You slidin’?”

“Yeah,” I told him while poppin’ my trunk.

“What time?”

“The same time we always go.”

I tossed the duffel bag inside and closed the trunk before walkin’ around to the driver’s side. “Bet. I’m ‘bout to go home, shower and get dressed. I’ma hit you when I’m headin’ that way.”

“A’ight.”