Page 66 of A Little Bit More
Lake sighed. For some reason, when he’d moved to Invertary years earlier, he’d become Betty’s keeper. He’d be the first to admit it was partly his fault; the woman entertained him. Her mind worked in devious patterns that were hard to follow. Lake had often thought that, in another life, she’d be ruling her own country or working as an international spy. Unfortunately, in this life, she was stuck terrorizing a small Highland town.
Taking the newsletter with him, he headed downstairs to the security shop that he mainly kept because Betty liked to pretend she worked there. He found her sitting on her old La-Z-Boy chair in the corner of the room by the window, scowling out into the street.
“That’s your last newsletter,” Lake said as he handed it to her. It was pointless being subtle with Betty—it went straight over her head.
She gave him a scheming look. “And why would I stop when I’m just getting started?”
“You’re annoying Kirsty. We talked about this. Annoying Kirsty is your boundary. You cross that line, and you have to be reeled back in. No more newsletters.”
“Who made you the boss of me?”
Lake got the distinct impression that if he hadn’t confiscated all of the stun guns she’d “acquired” from his shop, he’d have one pressed to his balls right then.
“Somebody has to be the boss of you,” he said without remorse. “No more using my staff as your paperboys, no more newsletters. Find another interest.”
“I don’t want another interest. You’re ruining my fun.”
“Cry me a river.”
She held up her phone. “If tweeper’s no use, and The Face Book doesnae work, and you won’t let me use my God-given right to express myself, then what’s the bloody point of this machine?”
“You can use the GPS to find your way back from the wilderness when I dump you there for writing another newsletter. You know how to use GPS, right?”
“That’s elder abuse,” Betty said, but he detected admiration in her voice. “What’s GPS?”
“Global Positioning System. It tells you your location.”
“And how would that help me find my way back to Invertary? All that would do is tell me where I was.” She stared at her phone with pure disgust. “Why do people spend so much time on these things? They’re boring as hell. You cannae even see the letters on it for typing. Harry had to give me a wee plug-in keyboard so I could write my newsletters.”
“Which you’re going to stop. Right now.”
“That’s taking away my freedom of speech, that is.”
Lake just cocked an eyebrow at her. “You annoy Kirsty one more time, and you can kiss goodbye toallyour freedoms.” With that, he turned and headed back up to his office.
Feeling Betty’s eyes burning into his back with every step he took.
Fifteen minutes later, the fire alarm went off.
Lake ran down the stairs to find Betty standing with a Taser in her hand. His new receptionist had her hands over her ears, and the blood had drained from her face. She shot Lake a terrified glance before bursting into tears.
“She made me give it to her,” Phoebe wailed.
On the countertop between Phoebe and Betty sat a burning phone.
Lake grabbed the fire extinguisher and aimed it at the growing blaze, then removed the Taser from Betty before it recharged and she could do more harm.
“Did you know there are special batteries in phones that can go on fire at the slightest wee blast with a Taser?” Betty asked. “I didn’t. It’s a wonder they let people walk around with those things. They’re an accident waiting to happen.”
With that, she picked up her huge black handbag, which was usually stuffed with half-eaten pies and cans of Irn-Bru, and tottered out of the shop. Leaving Lake with a wailing receptionist and a scorched section of his front counter.
