Page 98 of The Incredible Ordinary

Jordan’s gaze finds mine.

“Thanks,” he says again.

“Have fun.” The words are acidic on my tongue, the tone an audible snap I can’t mask with anything.

I turn around sharply and start to walk.

We take the subway and then walk the last few blocks. Rory and Theo are a few steps in front of me, talking and occasionally shoving each other while laughing—Theo with a full belly laugh and Rory with considerably more restraint. It’s almost like he doesn’t want to laugh, but every now and then he forgets himself and the laughter escapes.

It’s already dark outside when we make it to Theo and Jordan’s place.

“I’ll go get Dog,” Theo says cheerfully, and that wasn’t exactly my plan, but they do it after every practice, so far be it from me to be the one to ruin the routine just because I’m a bitter asshole.

I go with them because there’s no Jordan, and I need all the distraction I can get right now when everything feels too quiet.

Quiet is the enemy.

It leaves room for imagination, and mine has been running rampant ever since I found out about Jordan’s date. Even now, I canseethem. Jordan and his nameless, faceless date. The two of them somewhere intimate, leaning close across the table. Candlelight and low music.

I canseeit. Her laughing, telling him “you’re so funny,” and touching his arm. Jordan smiling, that quiet, shy half smile. The one that usually makes my chest feel light. It doesn’t now. My chest is heavy with bitterness.

I imagine him walking her home. Her hair catching the streetlights. Him pushing a loose strand behind her ear. Leaning closer.

Jealousy hits like a bullet underneath my ribs and spreads until it fills my whole body.

And no matter how much I tell myself that this is a good thing, this is how it’s supposed to go, this is necessary, this iswhat I want… In the end I’m not that convincing, so it doesn’t make much difference.

The weather turns to shit almost as soon as we make it to the park. Sleet comes down hard, and even Dog’s enthusiasm for the great outdoors wanes quickly, so we head back.

The front door of Jordan’s house opens before Theo’s made it all the way up the stairs.

“Getting wet out there,” Remy calls out.

I push my hair out of my face.

“Just a little bit.”

He pushes the door open wider. “Well what are you all waiting for, then? Come in before you get pneumonia.”

“We should really get going,” I say.

“Tea?” Remy asks.

Theo and Rory exchange glances, and after some wordless communication, they both head to the front door.

I sigh and follow them.

“Tea sounds great,” I tell Remy once I reach him. Heading home would be the sensible thing to do, but I can’t seem to make myself leave.

We end up in the kitchen while Theo and Rory park themselves on the living room floor, each grabbing a controller.

Remy boils water and takes out a metal box full of tea bags.

“Not much of a selection,” he says. “Mostly peppermint. Lemon if you’re lucky.”

“Peppermint is fine.”

The water starts to boil, and Remy pours it into the cups. He sits down opposite and pushes one of the cups in front of me.