Page 107 of The Incredible Ordinary

He pulls away too soon. His palm is still pressed against the side of my neck, so hot it burns my skin. Fingertips sink into the back of my neck.

“We can’t.” His fingers tighten. The words are pushed out with effort.

“Why not?” I ask with audible desperation. His proximity is the kind of temptation that stops all rational thoughts. I’m ready to beg.

“I don’t think you understand what you’re asking for.”

“I know what I want,” I say through gritted teeth.

“No. You said you’re a relationship guy.” He follows that up with a helpless shrug.

“So?” I ask.

He pushes himself off me. Pries himself free of his hold of me.

“So… So…” He drags both his hands through his hair before he starts to pace, then stops immediately to whirl toward me. “So. I don’t know what I am, but so farthathasn’t been it.” He’s starting to look more than a little freaked out. “We’re friends.” He delivers the words more like a plea.

I draw in a big breath as he sits back down on the edge of the bed, and then I go and sit down next to him.

We’re both silent for a long time.

“You’re into me,” I finally say. “You want me.”

He laughs. That, too, is seasoned with desperation.

“I don’t know how to do this,” he says. “I’ve never—not with somebody who matters like you do.”

His shoulder is pressed against mine. It gives me strength, even if the owner of said shoulder is full of doubt right now.

“But you want to?” I surprise even myself with my calm tone.

“I want to,” he says, voice a rasp. “I…” For a moment it looks like he wants to say more, but in the end he just shakes his head and says, “Want to.”

My shoulders slump, and something relaxes inside me. I’m not alone with this. Even if I’m not quite sure whatthiseven is or could possibly be. I’ve won the battle.

“Okay,” I say on a relieved breath. “Okay.” And I smile. It’s complicated, but I still feel happy.

What now?

Do I make a move?

What do I do?

He’s vibrating with tension next to me, and for some reason I want to laugh.

I think he’s nervous. And I’m nervous. But the fact that he’s nervous makes me feel better.

I turn my body, angling it so that I’m facing him.

He mirrors my position.

I lick my lips, and his eyes follow my tongue.

“Hey,” I say hoarsely, and he closes his eyes for a moment, then laughs.

“Hey yourself,” he replies.

I lean forward, and he meets me halfway. Our foreheads touch. Our noses touch. His breath is warm on my skin. I shiver with anticipation.