Page 69 of Come Back to Me

Great, here come the tears again.

My body shakes. “Ugh, I’m such an idiot. How did I think that being friends with him was a good idea? Why do Ioverthink every little thing I do?” I wipe away the tears falling out of my eyes with my fingertips.

“You’re talking to the queen of overthinking. It’s the absolute worst. Overthinking is like an extension of anxiety. Our minds never shut off and keep putting us through endless cycles of bullshit.”

My mouth gapes open as I clap my hands. “Yes, exactly.”

“You’re not an idiot, by the way. I think being friends is a smart way to ease back into whatever you two had in the past, but with less baggage. That is if you both decide to get back together at any point in the future.” She shakes her head, scrunching her nose. “Sorry,less baggagewasn’t the right phrase to use.”

“It’s okay. It’s not about me letting Grayson back into my life that I’m worried about. It’s him letting me back intohislife. What if I hurt him again? I don’t know what I’d do if that happens.”

“It won’t. You need to tell yourself it’s going to be okay. Again, you’re talking to someone who has constant battles with their mind. You have to fight until you win. You can’t let the anxious thoughts win, Violet. Allow yourself this victory.”

I tilt my head at a slight angle. “How are you so wise?”

She rolls her eyes, exhaling. “Honestly, I’m hanging out with the idiot club too much. They’re handing out motivational speeches like candy on Halloween.”

We both break out into laughter.

It’s nice to have a friend who’s a girl. Growing up, I didn’t have any female friendships. I was happy with my romance books and Grayson. I didn’t need to deal with maintaining a friendship that had the chance of not lasting.

Dani was the one girl who I wanted to be friends with. I loved how she wasn’t afraid to tell it like it is and how confident she was. It was hard to be friends with her because she’d spend her time and energy having screaming matches with Noah.

I did become friends with Willow, one of the employees who started working at Sweet & Salty during my freshman year at SCU. It’s weird having friends now.

I snap myself back to reality. “You know I’ve never really had any female friends.”

She giggles. “Female friends?”

“Oh, you know what I mean. Friends who are girls.”

“How is that possible?”

“I don’t know. There was always one girl I wanted to be friends with back then.”

“Who?”

“You,” I say.

Her lips turn into a cute little frown. “Really? Me, too. And I’m so sorry I never made an effort to talk to you more when we were younger. I was so wrapped up inWar of Wordswith Noah. That, and I lost my dad my freshman year of high school. It would’ve been nice to have you there.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. Whether we were friendly or not, I should’ve been there for you.”

“Violet, you don’t need to apologize. You did nothing wrong. If there’s any consolation, I should’ve been there for you. When we ran into each other at Just One More Chapter a couple months ago, all I could think about was finals week during senior year. I was on my way to my English final, and I saw Grayson walk by you. He didn’t look at you once. I could feel your heart shattering. I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that alone.”

Placing both of my hands on my heart, I smile. “I wasn’t alone. I had your boyfriend. I’m lucky I did because I don’t know if I’d be here right now without him.”

“Noah has a way with words, doesn’t he?”

“I think you’d know better than me.” A suggestive expression writesitself all over my face.

“He always tells me how I made him fall under my spell. When in reality, it’s him who cast me under his spell.”

“That’s so cute. It makes me want to throw up.” I chuckle a little bit.

“You’d think it would make me feel like that, too, but it doesn’t. I think when you’re a romance author and reader, it changes you and your perception about love. It gives you hope and unrealistic expectations at the same time.” Dani glances at the clock in front of us. “Shit, it’s getting late.”

“It’s almost midnight! Grayson is going to be at the apartment twelve hours from now.”