Page 45 of Chasing Hope

“Did Cindy drug you too?” Matteo barks.

I point at his horrified face. “It went everywhere!” My hiccups continue to worsen the longer I laugh but I can’t stop, even when my stomach begins to ache from the muscle strain.

Matteo’s phone rings, joining my manic sound, but when he places the flashing screen in front of my face, my laughter dies a sudden death. Even my hiccups stop, the name scaring them away.

Serena Ellington.

“You need to talk to her. You can’t keep dodging her calls,” he says, matter-of-factly. “And I’m feeling uneasy about lying to her all the time.”

Squeezing my eyes shut, I suddenly feel like I’m spinning.

Perhaps now is the best time to talk to her. Maybe Cindy got me drunk enough I won’t remember what she says in the morning.

I grab the phone from him, sighing. Even the electric shock I always feel when I graze his skin doesn’t make me feel better.

You can do this, Evie.

Yet as I’m holding the phone in my palm, I find I can’t force my thumb to swipe across the screen and answer the call.

It stops ringing.

Matteo sighs. “Why are you avoiding her? Dove, what’s going on? Did something happen?”

Lifting my head to his, he blurs in front of me, swaying.

Wait, is he swaying or am I?

“Dove?” he asks with a frown.

The phone starts ringing again.

The sudden sound, paired with the name, makes me scream. Instinctively, my hand shoots upwards, the phone flying with the momentum, but Matteo catches it.

He huffs. “Actually, you shouldn’t talk to her when you’re this drunk?—”

“Fuck her, I’m not weak! I can face her!”

Snatching the phone from his hand, and ignoring his wide eyes, horrified at my outburst, the wine takes over. Liquid courage makes me hit answer.

I lift my nose in the air. “Mother,” I say curtly.

Matteo’s brows pucker into a frown at my tone, but he can’t see the secret I’m hiding. No one saw for years.

And he doesn’t need to see this, either.

Spinning on my heel, I hurry through the living room until I’m out on the balcony. I’m hit by the crisp night wind, the harshness of it sobering me slightly as my mother sighs on the other end of the phone.

“Finally! Evie, I’ve been trying to talk to you for weeks!”

I know, I think to myself.

“What’s this I hear about you and Carter breaking up? Are you okay?”

The genuine worry in her voice has me scoffing before that turns into a bark of incredulous laughter.Is she fucking serious?“Interesting. You sound like you care more about my break-up than what actually matters.”

My mother sighs again, but instead of it sounding like relief, this is more potent, her lungs filling with resentment. After all, I know exactly what it feels like to have someone say they love you when what they really want is for you to shut up.

“Are you still harping on about this?”