Page 230 of Fighting Chance

We both fall silent, both of us hesitant to hang up the phone, but we’re forced to as Kieran flicks his blinker on and pulls into the parking lot. “We’re here, Mom.”

“You’ve got this, Layla. You’re strong. It worked before, it will work again.”

“Okay,” I say, but even to my own ears my voice is meek.

“I love you sweetie.”

“I love you,” I all but choke out.

I know why I’m upset. I know why my hands shake as I hit the end call button. I know why I can’t face Kieran as he parks the car and takes off his seat belt. I am utterly terrified because I canfeelit—something’s wrong.

I didn’t realize he got out of the car, was in such a daze, until my door is opening and Kieran is reaching over and unbuckling my seat belt for me. He presses such a gentle kiss to my forehead tears spring into my eyes.

“Sunshine?” he probes.

“I’m scared,” I confess, my lip wobbling.

“I know, baby,” he says, just as guttural.

This, I realize is breaking him. Seeing me like this isbreakinghim.

The very thing I wanted to protect him from is happening and I’m in too deep, too far in love with him, to push him away and save him from the misery that I know is coming. The endless questions, needles and tests, the utter confusion and endless unanswered questions.

It’s hell.

People always question if hell and heaven are real, and I feelso confident when I say it’s real because hell for me is my broken body. You don’t have to die to feel its depths.

Kieran slides his hands up my neck and cups my cheeks, lifting my eyes to his. I see my misery mirrored in his depths. “I’m here, Layla. For every moment I will be right beside you.”

“That’s what guts me.”

“Wellun-gut yourself, Layla Carson, because there isn’t a world in which you can get rid of me, so let’s do this together.” Stepping back, he gives me enough room to slide out of the car, holding out his arm when my knees almost give out.

“Jeez, you’re stubborn.”

“Telling me something I already know, sunshine.”

“And very perky.”

He snorts to himself as he locks the car. “The only time I’mperkyis when I’m inside you.”

Gasping, I whack his shoulder, wincing when my body berates me for it. “Hey! PG mouth in here, buddy.”

“No such thing, sorry.”

“Insufferable man.”

“Hot man.”

Rolling my eyes, Kieran lets me lean against him as he presses the elevator button.

“How about sexy man?” he asks.

“Very sexy, but a horrendous mouth on you.”

He drops his mouth to my ear. “A horrendous mouth you like to have running in the bedroom.”

The elevator doors open right as my cheeks flush as red as my hair. The elderly couple on the other side take one look at me and my cocky boyfriend grinning like the Cheshire Cat, lower their heads, and hightail it out of the elevator.