Page 99 of Shattered Oaths

“Have you ever known her to take prescription drugs?”

“No. Not that I can recall.”

I always knew this day would come.

I knew that she was killing herself slowly.

“Did she have any contact with her ex-husband?”

“No. I don’t think so.”

I even knew that it would be me that found her.

But what I didn’t prepare myself for, was having to make the decision.

“Mr Ashby, do you need me to call someone? A grandparent or…”

What I didn’t expect, is for her tofailat taking her own life.

And now, the two people she brought into the world, had to be the ones to take her out of it.

What kind of sick sense of irony is that?

“What I need is for you to stop asking me fucking questions.” My brothers booming voice pierces through my thoughts and I slowly blink up at him; the anxiety pill Liv slipped me the moment she arrived doing wonders for my mental state.

“Killian!” Daisy scolds. “Calm down, he’s just doing his job.”

He takes a deep breath, his head dropping in shame as he mutters a quiet apology to the doctor. He just nods his head and turns to leave, letting us know he’ll give us some time.

The machine beside the bed beeps a steady rhythm, the sound a constant reminder that although her brain is dead, our mom is still very much alive.

An overdose, they had said. Likely caused by mixing high quantities of alcohol with more than the recommended amount prescription pain medication.

The long, thick tube coming from her mouth is the only thing keeping her chest rising and falling as it pumps oxygen into her lungs, and in just a few minutes, Killian and I have to give our permission to switch it off.

I stare at her lifeless body unblinking, silent tears rolling down my face as I picture everything we missed out on because of her addiction.

I let myself feel all the hate, disappointment and resentment I’ve harboured inside of me for years.

“I’m going to leave the two of you alone,” Daisy says, but Killian reaches out, his hand wrapping around hers as he shakes his head once.

“Please don’t leave.” He sounds like nothing more than a lost little boy in that moment and my arms tighten around myself, chest aching as I watch the two of them. The ache deepens when Killian pulls Daisy against him and buries his head into her neck as his shoulder shake with silent sobs while she whispers reassuring words in his ear.

Despite knowing that Savannah and Liv are just outside those doors in the waiting room, I don’t move from my seat. Instead, I continue watching from the corner as my brother seeks comfort from his wife while the one person I need now more than ever, the one person that could ease even a fraction of the pain inside of me, is the only person that isn’t here.

Just as the thought enters my mind, the doors to the private ICU room swings open and Noah steps inside, his chest heaving and eyes wild as they move from Killian to the hospital bed and all of the medical equipment, before finally landing on me.

“Baby,” he breathes, moving straight for me.

That one whispered is all it takes for the breath to rush from my lungs in one long exhale as I stand and collapse into him.

The moment his arms come around me, all of the betrayal and heartache from the last two weeks is pushed aside as my grief takes over and the dam that had been holding my emotions finally breaks.

CHAPTER 43

NOAH

Clara Ashby passed away on a warm Sunday evening with her two children by her bedside.