Page 58 of Fall or Nothing

I couldn’t hold back anymore, breaking out into sobs that shook my entire body. A good, hard cry that was probably a long time coming. When I finally drifted off to sleep, I yearned for him and was nowhere closer to figuring out what to do about him.

NINETEEN

Chased

CARTER

“You look like a zombie.”Jake observed me stumbling out into the dawn.

Did I put my boots on the wrong feet? Wouldn’t put it past me. I’d been up half the night. Couldn’t sleep with the way Sage and I had left things. I’d mucked out the stables until the early hours and talked to the horses instead of tossing and turning in my bunk, a decision I regretted now.

“What the hell are we doing today?” I rubbed both eyes.

Ash came up and explained. “We started a new tradition last year. Each day after Thanksgiving, assuming we have snow—which this is Montana, so of course we do—we break out the sleighs and give free rides all day to anyone in the community who stops by. They bring canned goods to donate to the local food bank. This was Chris’s idea; he’s big on giving back. He bought two beautiful wooden sleighs last year that we use on this occasion. Here they come now.”

Eldon’s truck appeared, hauling a flatbed behind it with said sleighs. They were a little dusty from storage, butI could see they’d shine with dark wood and brass accents when cleaned up.

My half-brother was a saint. Always doing some good.

Then there was me. Ripping the heart out of a sweet, small-town woman.

“Ash, I’m not feeling so great today,” I groaned, holding my stomach.

“You look like shit, too.” He motioned for me to follow him off to the side. Jake cast me a pitiful glance and left us. “What the fuck is going on with you?”

No point lying to Ash. Although I wasn’t sure how much he knew about my situation with Sage. I filled him in on the basic details.

“So you went against my advice and got yourself involved with her, anyway? Did you think I was joking when I warned you?” He raised his voice, and I shrank back.

“No, sir. I just thought that she… I’d hoped that I… I thought we could handle it, not getting in too deep.”

“Jesus. Get the fuck out of my sight right now,” he grumbled. “Wait, I had a message from Chris. He’s flying in. He’s arranged for your extraction on your last day tomorrow. Between the whole debacle with Red Amos and now Sage? I think it’s best you get ready to leave our ranch.”

Extraction? I snorted, imagining a military operation to extract me from the ranch.

He stalked away, leaving me feeling more like shit than ever. Not even the thought of the money I was about to come into could cheer my mood. I headed back into the quiet of the bunkhouse and fell into my bunk, shutting out the world around me—one I’d no longer belong in after tomorrow.

I woke mid-afternoon,surprised Ash and the guys would let me sleep that long. The sounds of people wafted in from outside. Already dressed, I brushed my teeth and guzzled a gallon of water. When I reached for the coat I’d worn every day—the one belonging to Sage’s dad—it fell on the floor.

The inside of the jacket landed face up, the shearling lining well-worn but still able to provide warmth. Like her, it’d seen me through this experience. I almost hated to part with it. But I’d have to tomorrow. Just like I’d be leaving Sage behind. I’d rolled the situation over in my head all night long. How could she possibly fit into my life in New York? But how could I fit into her life here? We were two opposites never meant to attract, but did.

I picked up the jacket, noticing something sticking out of the inner pocket I hadn’t seen before.

I pulled out an old letter; the paper yellowed around the edges, the handwriting barely readable.

My dearest Mrs. Wylde,

I’m writing this from the kitchen table, though you’re only out helping a neighbor with her newborn for the day. You kind, loving soul.

The girls helped me in the garden this morning. Sage insisted on planting the lavender exactly where the sunlight hits longest, saying it “felt right.” I didn’t have the heart to tell her she sounds just like me with my love ofthe land.

The rows of baby apple trees are a joyous sight. Everything we’re growing is still small, still finding its roots, but I think that’s the beauty of it. We don’t rush things here. We let them take their time, settle in, and become what they’re meant to be.

I miss you, darling, even though you’ll be home in a few hours.

In case you forgot, just wanted to remind you that there’s a place for you here in everything we’re building… and in every corner of my heart.

Always yours,