Page 52 of Flowers To Give

“And last I saw Clark was in one of the back rooms, the one with all the books,” Ryan tacks on.

Eneki waves goodbye, “Aloha, Jeremy. And good luck.”

He nods to the group, ducking into the shadows and making his way to the back of the house with the last beer from the six pack in hand.

Making his way through the house is a feat, spilling half his beer and drinking the rest as he elbows through the throng. It takes forever to search each room, looking for somewhere he assumes resembles a library. Eventually, he finds exactly that. A large and heavy mahogany door leads to a more chilled and quiet room where people lounge around and pass a blunt or mingle around the self service bar in the back.

Jeremy scans the room but doesn’t find Clark. He decides to take the opportunity of this reprieve to get himself another whiskey, putting it on the rocks. Sipping the drink and getting his buzz going again, he looks over the room once more and spies an interior door, smaller and made of a different wood. Approaching the handle, a woman calls out, “Jeremy Munday, how are you?”

Monica, Clark’s personal assistant, walks up to him and smiles. He nods to her and says, “Hey, it’s been a minute. I’d love to catch up but I’m actually looking for Clark. Have you seen him?”

“Um,” her eyes land on the door behind Jeremy’s back.

He looks to it and asks her, “In there?”

“No!” She says way too quickly, trying to save face by smirking and adding casually, “No, I mean, I haven’t seen him.”

Jeremy bites his bottom lip and squints at her, saying, “I feel like he’s in there.”

“Nope.”

“I’m just going to go take a quick look,” Jeremy turns to the door.

Monica grabs his arm and pulls him back, “No, really don’t!”

Liquor and beer making him more stubborn than usual, Jeremy yanks his hand away and hurriedly rushes toward the door, swinging it open.

The first thing he’s greeted with is the image of Clark’s bare ass flexing as he thrusts in and out of a naked man bent underneath him. Jeremy blinks when Laurelai says from beside him, “Howdy, cowboy.”

Jeremy looks to the side and locks eyes with a naked Laurelai as Jackie eats her out. The ranch hand doesn’t seem to have noticed Jeremy’s entrance, her mouth licking and sucking the labia and flattening against her vulva. But Clark heard Laurelai very clearly, Jeremy sensing the movement slowing from that part of the small sitting room.

Unable to stop himself, Jeremy glances over once more and catches sight of the base of Clark’s cock as it starts to pull out of the anonymous ass. His eyes flick up and hardly catch Clark’s from over his shoulder before Jeremy is jetting back out of the room and racing out of the library, Monica calling after him, “I tried to stop you!”

Officially done with this party, Jeremy downs the rest of his whiskey and sets the tumbler on the first flat surface he can find as he pushes back through the congested hallways. He’s squeezing by sideways when a large hand comes up and grabs on to Jeremy’s wrist. Fear strikes him but he looks back and is relieved to see it’s Barry.

In the middle of the crowd, Jeremy rushes Barry and collapses in on his large chest. He knew he was trying to avoid the ranch hand, but some familiarity right now is exactly what he needs. Looking up, he says to Barry, “I’m leaving.”

“What?” Barry doesn’t hear him, turning his head.

Jeremy speaks up, “I’m leaving! Now!”

“No!” Barry calls out, wrapping his arms around Jeremy, “Don’t go! Let’s dance!”

Barry doesn’t understand him. Jeremy doesn’t mean he’s leaving the party, but his initial reaction and meaning is that he wants to leave the ranch. He never wants to see Clark again, and Barry just doesn’t understand that. Suddenly feeling trapped, Jeremy shakes his head and pushes away from Barry, saying, “I have to go!”

Barry tries calling out to Jeremy but that’s lost on him, already rushing away. The image of Clark having sex with a man is burned in the back of his eyelids, searing his memory. The whole thing makes him want to sprint at full speed, getting the sensation that he’s being suffocated by all these bodies and his heart accelerating anxiously.

The foyer is still packed, people jumping up and down to the rhythm of a fat beat that vibrates the whole house. Jeremy could be squished under their feet and not know the difference, never having felt this small before. Making his final push out the front door, the fresh air from outside still isn’t enough.

Immediately pulling out a cigarette from his pack, he tries to strike the match but it won’t catch a spark. A hand extends in front of him, lit lighter right in front of his face. Looking up, Merle is the one holding out the lighter, looking at Jeremy expectantly. Maintaining eye contact, Jeremy leans forward and inhales the flame.

Merle puts away the lighter after Jeremy’s stogie is lit, saying, “Leaving so soon?”

“Merle,” Jeremy wants to tell him to get out of his face, forget about whatever they had, but instead he asks, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Taking a deep breath, Merle offers with a kind smile, “I didn’t want you to think of me differently, I guess.”

Jeremy briefly closes his eyes and shakes his head a bit, saying aloud, “I feel so stupid.”