Page 50 of His Arranged Plus-Size Mate

“Why don’t you take a break. Take a shower or have something to eat. I can heat up some leftovers for you.”

“I don’t have time to take a break, Asher.” She crossed her arms, and anger crossed her face. “I have gotten nowhere with this. I haven’t had any nightmares that are giving me any new information. I can’t even pinpoint where these nightmares seem to be. I haven’t felt a connection since that one time. I can’t take a break when I’m clearly not working hard enough.”

I stepped closer. “Hazel, you can’t push yourself too hard. If you overwork yourself, you’re not going to learn.”

“You don’t understand!” She snapped at me as she pulled herself up. “You’re not a witch, so you have no idea what this feels like! You don’t get it! This is not something that you can relate to! Stop telling me to relax when you can’t relate!”

“I’m just trying to give you some advice. I know I can’t relate to how you’re feeling, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to help you if I can.”

“I don’t want it!” she screamed at me, throwing her arms up. “I have told you over and over that I do not want your help!” She stormed into the kitchen. “Stop making me feel worse than I already do!”

I frowned, following her. “I’m not trying to make you feel bad, Hazel. I’m trying to help. I just want to help.”

“Well, you’re not helping!”

I threw my hands up. “Then tell me what I can do to help. What will make you happy?”

I watched her shoulders drop. She looked away from me. “I don’t know. I don’t know how to do anything. I am trying so damn hard to make this work, trying to connect the dots and feel that Jade and Nora said is right in front of me, but I don’t. I feel like a wall is dividing me from everything else, and I can’t get over it.”

She rubbed her hand through her hair. “I feel like I’m failing over and over. I can feel everyone is waiting for me to get there. I walk anywhere, and people watch me. I know that they are waiting for me to just magically piece it all together. Every time someone tells me I’m going to get there, I just want to hit them.”

“Do you want to hit me? Will that make you feel better?” I moved closer, spreading my arms out. “You can hit me.”

“No! I just..” She paused, and I watched her huff for air. “I just don’t understand. I’ve done the research, I’ve sat in silence, I’ve trained with the others, and nothing seems to help. I am exactly where I was when I started.”

I took a step toward her, and she took one back. Her shoulders sagged as she swallowed. Her anger simmering, and I noticed fear and despair took their place. “I feel like I’m failing you,” she whispered.

I moved closer, reaching out for her and pulling her into my arms. “You’re not failing me. You could never.”

She sniffled, and I wished I could make it better. I wish I had the answer to her problems and knew how to help. But she was right, I wasn’t a witch, and I couldn’t help with that. I could only be there for her.

Chapter 18 - Hazel

I felt the tears burning as he held me. I hated this feeling, like I wasn’t worthy. I was trying so hard, putting endless hours into learning how to use my magic, and I wasn’t getting anywhere. I felt like I was going in circles.

Nora and Jade had told me that it takes time, but time wasn’t on our side. The guys had already explained that the hybrids were growing in numbers and that we didn’t have much longer before this would get out of control. The barrier was up, but it lasted only so long. I could hardly focus because of the pressure that was pressing down on me.

I sniffled and rubbed at my eyes. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell, I’m just frustrated.” I knew how desperate everyone was getting. Even Jade and Nora seemed to be unsure of why I was having such a hard time.

Asher cupped my face, his eyes looking at me with nothing but kindness. “Don’t apologize. Out of everyone, you don’t need to apologize to me.”

He leaned closer, his fingers soft against my skin. “You are amazing, Hazel. The most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. You’re resilient and strong-headed. You will master this just like you have so many other things.”

I felt my heart skip a beat at his words.

“You don’t mean that.” He was saying that to get me to calm down.

“Yes, I do. I mean every word. You are an amazing witch, and I see how hard you work. You’ve been amazing at the healing center, and I’ve heard so many people compliment your abilities.You are so great, and I hate to see you put yourself down like this. I hate seeing you not being able to see what I see.”

His forehead pressed against mine. “This is just a rough patch, but give it time, and you will be unstoppable. I know it.”

I let his word sink in, trying to tell myself it was true. I wanted so badly to believe him.

“You’re kind and sweet. You’re caring and gentle.” His face pressed closer, his breath brushing against my skin. I stared into his eyes, seeing just how much he meant it.

I leaned forward just as he did and kissed him. It was soft, like lips just brushing against mine. But he did it again and again. Each kiss is a little rougher than the last. I moaned softly as his hand cupped the back of my head.

He pulled my body against his, and we stumbled back into the wall. I felt my back press against it, his teeth scraping against my lower lip. “Fuck, you have no idea the power you hold, Hazel.”