Page 8 of Shades of Grey & Gold

She scoffs, dramatically rolling her eyes. “Maxine Simmons. I know you hate the guy, and I know he’s an asshole, and I know we would prefer he moved to some ice-covered, dark corner of the Earth… but who cares? What if we just said, ‘Who cares?’ about anything Patrick related?” She stands up and dramatically brushes herself off and takes my hands, pulling me up to stand. “You’re better than him, always have been, always will be. Let him see how great you’re doing, coexist on the same block of Main Street, and act like you didn’t even realize he was here. Your life is yours without him. That’s better, even if it doesn’t always feel better. This is a nice opportunity for him to know it, too.”

I look at her, consider her words, but my eyes drift down to the floor. Is my life better without him? I’m not being conned into a relationship by a sociopath who is cheating on me with four different women, sure, but I was happier then. Ignorant, sure, but happier during our relationship. I felt like I had a purpose at Ellison, I had friends and a life. And he wrecked that life.

“I felt loved by Patrick, even if it was fake. I had a job I cared about. People who cared about me. A life.” The admission leaves my mouth before I can soften it. “Now I just feel…lame. Miserable.”

I hate myself a little for saying it, but there it is.

“Ignorance really was bliss.”

Becca hugs me. “You don’t actually wish you could go back and be ignorant, you just wish you could feel happy again. It’s okay to want to feel happy again. But it’s not okay to wish to be with someone who treated you like second, third, or fourth best most of the time and put you absolutely last on his list of priorities. You felt like he loved you, but Max… I remember you in those days. You weren’t you. You wore heels every day, dressed in pencil skirts that you thought were uncomfortable. Your hair had blonde streaks in it because Patrick liked it that way. You love your brown hair. You weren’t you. You may think you were happier, but I won’t let you wish for that life back.”

She sighs, pulling back to look in my eyes as she continues, “I still think this can be a small deal that doesn’t mean we have to burn the house—but we can, if you want, as long as your insurance is paid up.”

I manage a laugh and a smile. She’s right. I do want the happy feeling, but not the delusional part; not the guy who walked all over me.

“I know I’m stronger now, and better now, I just didn’t need a glaring reminder of what happened and what I walked away from—even though I had no choice but to walk away, you know?”

She nods. “Are you done with work today? It’s only one o’clock, I figured you’d be at the office until at least four tonight.”

“No, but I am done being at the office. I do have to go get my laptop and tell Carla I’m working from home the rest of the day though.” I turn around and stare at the front door, which suddenly looks ominous and huge.

Becca clicks her tongue and walks over to the door, scooping up my purse as she walks, throws the door open and grabs Bart’s leash from the hook. “Bart and I will walk with you! Let’s go!” Bart is jumping up at Becca, and she snaps his leash on, gesturing wildly at me. “Get moving, Simmons, let’s get this over with.”

I reluctantly drag my feet and take my purse from her, hanging it next to the door after taking my phone and keys out and stuffing them in my back pockets. “I guess I have to take you up on the offer to help me get new clothes if I’m going to pull off the blasé, ‘I’m better and didn’t even know you were in the neighborhood’ act.”

Becca jumps up and down on the sidewalk, beaming. “Yes! I can’t wait.”

Chapter Four

Max

Wesnakeourwayaround to Main Street, and I peek around the corner to make sure there aren’t any suits standing at the end of the block. I’m relieved to see the box trucks have departed. I breathe a sigh of relief as we make our way to my office.

When we step in, I hear Carla upstairs laughing loudly, and Debbie gives me a wide-eyed look, shaking her head. We all know that laugh, she’s trying to impress someone andnetwork—poor soul.

“I’m just grabbing my laptop and heading home. I won’t interrupt her, but will you let her know I left when she’s done with all… that?” I whisper, glancing from Debbie to the top of the stairs with a half-smile and a cringe.

“Yep, some older guy came in, they acted like old friends, it was strange.” She shakes her head. “He said he had a proposal for her or something.”

I make my way over to my desk to see Bart and Becca outside my window. She’s staring down the street at the offending building with her hands on her hips like a superhero. If looks could set a building on fire…

Checking the time quickly, I grab my things and head straight back to the door. The laughs have subsided, but as I grab the door, the little bell above it rings loudly. I cringe, cursing under my breath.

Carla’s voice sings down the stairs. “Oh, oh, she’s back! Let me grab her. Max!”

I frown in Debbie’s direction, and she gives me a sympathetic look.

I turn back towards the staircase. “Hey, Carla, I was just heading out.”

“Come up here for a moment, would you, please?” She says softly back down the stairs, popping her head around the wall above. Her hair is hanging in her face, and her eyes are wide, silently telling me this is not optional. She waves her hand wildly at me to come up.

I sigh, drop my laptop on Debbie’s desk and begrudgingly trudge up the stairs. At the top, I’m hit with cologne that smells like something my dad would wear mixed with the faint smell of cigars. Something inside of me turns with recognition, but I can’t place it.

I smooth down my cardigan, looking down at my jeans and shoes as I turn the corner into the sitting area outside of Carla’s office.

“Maxine Simmons, as I live and breathe,” a familiar gravelly voice floats through the air, and my blood runs cold.

Richard Ellison stands from his place on the leather armchair and Carla stands beside him. “Oh, what a reunion!” She claps her hands together and the phone rings from her office. “I’ll let you two catch up, be right back.”