Page 124 of Maybe Tomorrow

‘Malcolm, please,’ she interrupted. ‘I’m not ready for a baby yet.’

‘And how long will it be before you are? You’re thirty-eight, for crying out loud.’

‘Yes, and my mum was almost forty when she had me. Let me ask you this: if we had a baby, would you expect me to give up work and look after it?’

‘Yes.’

‘Then that’s why I don’t want one right now. I’m too busy to have a baby. I’m a partner in a law firm. I’m running a very busy charity. I have cases coming out of my ears and I cannot give all of that up.’

‘I can’t believe you’ve been lying to me all these years.’

‘I haven’t been lying to you.’

‘Then what’s this?’ He threw the box of tablets at her. They bounced off her chest.

‘I’ve been telling you I’m not ready for years.’

‘But all those tests I went for. You never once stopped me.’

‘You never told me you were going for any tests. You just told me the results.’

‘Because I was embarrassed. Do you have any idea how embarrassing it is to sit in a sterile room and wank off into a little plastic dish?’ he shouted.

‘You didn’t have to put yourself through that.’

‘I did it because I want us to become a family.’

‘And we will. Just not yet.’

‘When?’

Jennifer let the silence grow. ‘I don’t know.’

‘Will you ever be ready?’

She shook her head. ‘I don’t know that either.’

The doorbell rang.

Neither of them attempted to go and answer it.

The doorbell rang a second and third time.

‘I’ll go,’ Jennifer said.

She opened the front door to find a grinning Freya Sloan on the doorstep.

‘Can I come in?’ she asked. ‘I’ve got the most amazing news.’

‘Now isn’t really the best time, Freya, I’m sorry.’

‘I promise I won’t stay long.’ She pushed past her and entered the house.

Jennifer closed the door behind her.

‘Oh, hello Malcolm. You well?’ Freya said upon entering the kitchen.

‘Couldn’t be better,’ he said in an acidic tone.