And every single time… He’s there.
Sometimes sitting beside the bed.
Sometimes leaning back with his eyes closed but never fully asleep.
Sometimes already watching me before I even wake completely.
No matter how many times I drift in and out of darkness, Robert is here.
And I want him here. I know a part of me wants him to stay even beyond these sterile hospital walls.
I want his stupidly expensive food taking over my fridge again.
I want him to listen to Blue talk about her nightmare with goats and rude trees.
But wanting him makes everything worse. Because this… This is terrifying.
Blue almost died.
My baby almost died.
And even now, with Robert sleeping beside my hospital bed and Blue breathing fighting to come back to us, fear still crawls through me like smoke trapped beneath a door, knowing whoever did this is still out there.
Still breathing.
Still watching.
Maybe already close enough to touch.
The thought stalks me constantly now and I feel it sometimes before I even wake completely.
That horrible certainty like eyes are already on me.
Waiting.
Watching to see if we survived only to pounce again.