Page 116 of Always Love You More

She gazes up at me, looking so fucking broken. “You promise?”

I pull her into my chest. “Yeah, baby, I promise.”

“Thank you for coming,” she says against me. “I was so alone … and it was dark … and I didn’t know how I was gonna … if I was …”

“I’ll always come when you need me, no matter what.” I stroke her hair away from her face. “All I could think about when I found out was getting to you.”

“Oh my God, Jamie!”

My heart drops at the alarm in her voice.

She pushes away from me, and all I want to do is pull her back in.

“What?”

“Your dad …” She searches my eyes. “Are you okay?”

My shoulders drop, relieved. I thought something was wrong with her.

“I don’t really know,” I answer honestly. “I haven’t gotten there yet.”

Ican’tgo there yet.

Not when she needs me.

“Gotten where?”

“In my head,” I tell her. “It’s … a bit more complicated for me.”That’s a fucking understatement.

How do you even begin to grieve a person you’ve wished so many times was dead?

She nods, biting her lip, trying to hold back the sob that I know is crawling up her throat because it’s not complicated for her. She and her brother loved each other unconditionally.

I take her hand. “You don’t have to try to be strong for me now.”

“But you lost …” Her voice cracks. “You lost someone, too.” Her lip trembles as she tries to hold it together.

I shake my head. “Not like you did.”

“Jamie …” The sob finally breaks free as she says my name.

“You just let me take care of you, okay?”

She stares back at me, a war going on behind her eyes. I squeeze her hand, and she finally murmurs, “Okay.”

I let out a breath. “Let’s get you off the floor.” I move to pick her up and deposit her gently on the bed.

She curls up, making her body small, and I drape a blanket over her.

“I’m gonna go get you—”

She grabs my hand. “Don’t go.”

I still at the fear in her voice. “I was just gonna get you some water.”

“No.” Her grip on me tightens. “I don’t wanna be alone. You … Please don’t leave me here alone.”

“I won’t.” I drop down onto the bed beside her, and she immediately wraps herself around me. “I’m not going anywhere.”