Page 36 of How to Woo the Undead

“Yes?” He wheezed.

“And a kiss to the cheek means good morning,” she giggled, tugging on his shirt a little. Austin leaned forward. Her wings fluttered behind her as she pushed up on her toes.

“Yes,” He confessed. His heart thumped against the front of his ribs, attempting to flee his corpse.

“Then a kiss on the lips means what?”

“I…I don’t know.” He was simply breathless.Maybe I also got stabbed in the lungs.Her lips curled on her face. Wings fluttering faster, the candles around them dimmed a little from the change in airflow.

“Care to find out?” Her whispered words made his heart float away on a cloud of magic. Austin’s eyes only stayed open long enough to see her lift another three inches in the air. Then they slid closed as her lips found his. He kept his hands out to his side, panicked and unsure of what they would do…then her palms cupped his face, and he snatched her out of the air. His hands wrapped around her hips and dragged her into his chest. Her kiss was soft at first, delicate like a flower petal. Austin crushed it and smooshed it and flattened it against his mouth, chasing her taste.

Orange blossoms. Her lips tasted like orange blossoms and tart lemons and Earl Grey tea. Like there was something soft and subtle, a tea with a splash of honey, but it was mixed with a bright citrus that wouldn’t be ignored. Her lips parted and his tongue invaded her mouth eagerly.Wanting nothing more than to know every inch of her. Then hers joined the dance and suddenly, he sat her on the slab so he wouldn’t be tempted to twirl around.Calm down. You need to calm down.He dropped his hands from her hips to press his palms flat against the cold metal. She wrapped her legs around his waist and dragged him down with her. Till she was spread across the slab, hair spread around her head, lips damp and eyes glowing lavender. Austin leaned over the worktable, letting her break the kiss to catch her breath.

He sucked in air rapidly, unable to fill his desiccated lungs. Everything tasted like her.

“I think it means I like you,” she murmured, still panting heavily.

“Agreed,” he nodded rapidly. When his world stopped spinning, and he could actually focus on her, he found himself smiling. Broadly. Happily. Excitedly. Her fingers roamed his cheeks down to his chest. Austin steadily inched backward, bringing her with till she was sat up and he plopped down onto a stool.

“I really like you,” he confessed.

“Good, I hoped that’s what that kiss meant,” she giggled, ducking her head. He watched her fingers play with the hem of his shirt again. Austin was at a loss for words.And thoughts too; head empty.The smile on her face made his stomach twist up and heart flutter again. They lingered in that sweet, quiet bubble for a long time, the pair trying to relearn how to breathe.

He honestly opened his mouth to ask if he could kiss her again when they heard a loud thump that was followed by the panicked scratching of claws. Which really wasn’t all that disconcerting if it wasn’t cut off by a loud scream.

“Whathappened?”Austinfrozein the hallway, having found Melody on top of one of the end tables, Agatha clutched in herarms. His attention darted between the two then toward Smith who stood with a hand to his face. Carl sat with his tongue lulled out of his face, panting happy as could be.

“Everything’s fine, Austin,” Smith sighed.

“No! Everything isnot fine!” Melody barked.

“It-it-it just came to life. One moment it was just a regular spider plant, the next it was anactualspider!” Agatha jabbed a finger at the only thing at the center of the running carpet. The turned-over pot of the house plant that tended to dangle in the hallway, suddenly no longer where it belonged. It was a spindly little plant with a morph that made it inky black and smokey gray in color.

What was smashed against the ground was fuzzy.That’s not supposed to look like that.He grabbed the broom from Melody and poked at the pot. 16 spidery legs snapped to attention and jerked the pot up and off the floor. Austin and Hyacinth jumped back in unison, Agatha shrieked again and nearly clawed her way into Melody’s chest cavity. Smith sighed again and stomped his foot onto the pot.

The thing in the pot screamed. It was a small, wheezy sound, like a ghostly shriek muffled by the walls. Smith stared at Austin, even without having eyes, and Austin stammered, “Don’t look at me!”

“What is that!” Melody demanded, jabbing a clawed finger at the legs writhing outside the lip of the plant. It kicked and thrashed, the black bowl shifting left and right underneath Smith’s shoe. Austin grimaced.

“Itwasa plant,” Smith grumbled.

“It’s not a plantanymore,” Austin swatted at the fuzzy legs with the bristles of the broom.It didn’t like that. The pot immediately rumbled, nearly knocking Smith to the ground. Austin rushedto put his foot down on it when the legs thumped against the floor and flipped the bowl.

It was all legs, several fuzzy, long legs like a tarantula. The center of the plant, once where the main stalk and bulb used to sit, was a mouth. Teeth upon teeth upon teeth gnashed at him, all jagged and broken up like they’d been shattered. Agatha and Melody shrieked again as Austin and Smith scrambled to grab the creature. It skuttled away from them. Smith got ahold of one of its legs only to yell and drop it. He pulled back a hand full of needle pins that stood straight up.

“Whatisthat? Smith!” Melody roared.

Austin tried to sweep the thing into a corner, no longer content to grab it with his hand.I just put this one on! I don’t need to lose two in one day.

Havershum exploded out of the floor like a spinning top and buried his blade into the open maw of the plant. Over and over, he stabbed the creature until its screams turned to gurgles and there was potting soil spilling onto the floor. All of its legs stood straight up then curled inward with one last wheeze. Austin panted for air.

“Right on, Havershum.” Austin slapped the wraith on the back.

“By the dragons above, your timing is impeccable,” Smith wheezed. “Sweet girl, would you do me the horrific honors of plucking the quills from my hands.”

“You big baby,” Melody murmured affectionately as she climbed down off the end table.

“Need I remind you, that you were standing on a table?” he teased right back.