Page 61 of Kat Bethel

William threw away a decade of my hard work like it was nothing. He’d been a colossal waste of energy that I’d never get back.

My face hid in my knees as the sob finally won out over everything. A body I knew was Abiel sat behind me, but it didn’t feel like a man.

I was so small and defenseless in what I assumed was his arms. There was a sense that he towered over me, but safety washed over me, too. Like nothing could get to me wrapped in his shadow.

I was doomed.

When he let me fall, it would hurt even more.

A panic attack hit me like a ton of rocks, and I had to focus on my breathing to keep from hyperventilating.

He didn’t speak or issue anymore threats. Just held me so tight I was certain he could break me.

I’d never cried like this in front of my husband before.

Why was I showing a monster the pain inside when I never even sat with it myself? Too busy running to the next job, so I didn’t have to think about anything.

Like how I’d known deep down inside that my husband left me long ago, but refused to acknowledge it. I’d created more spacebetween us, refusing to come home, so I wouldn’t have to face the icy chill that rolled over me anytime he was around.

The same way killing myself had been easier than sitting in the silence of my empty home.

Chapter 22:

Iwokeupfloatingin the darkness. I wasn’t sure when I surrendered to his comfort, but it was like sleeping on a cloud. Had he held me the entire time?

Fingers caressed every inch of me. Countless hands hidden in the shadows.

He said I was the only person he could touch without destroying them. How long had it been since he could touch another human being?

Since that day?

That was probably why he couldn’t keep his hands to himself.

Flutters of kisses brushed my nose, and the shadows surrounding me pulled me tighter, as if he was scared I’d pull away. I was probably a mess of dried tears and snot, but he didn’t mind.

I tried moving my limbs, and his hands adjusted my weight like I was nothing, until I was straddling over something. He brushed the hair out of my eyes with gentle movements that contradicted the strength holding me where I was. “Do you feel better?”

“No.” My eyes burned and throbbed, and I’d bared myself to a monster who would devour me alive, like an idiot.

“Liar.” He pulled my head to rest against what felt like his chest and whispered, “I’ll never let you go. You’ll kill me before I do.”

His words were soothing to the gaping wounds inside me. I wanted to fight against it, to tell him he was the liar, but I was too exhausted from the night before to argue. I didn’t even know how to kill a shadow.

I didn’t even want to get rid of him.

Not really.

That was my real problem with him.

“Why can you touch me, but I can’t touch you?”

He grew more solid under me, as if to prove my point. “Do you want to touch me, Dandelion?”

I wanted to roll my eyes, but I didn’t have the energy. “Yeah, so I can hurt you.”

He chuckled in amusement, sensing my lie. To be fair, my voice wasn’t very convincing.

“Tell me what you want from me.” His breath tickled my ear.