Page 99 of Shine For Me

My eyes snap to my mom, but she’s looking away, like she’s caught up in the same memory Dad is sharing. My mom has dealt with panic attacks since she was a teenager. She hasn’t had one in a long, long time, but they used to be pretty rough.

“Yeah, so I decided I was done. There was no way I was going to put her through something like that again. It took your Mom a long time to talk me down.”

“You talked him out of it?” I ask her.

Mom smiles. “I did. I knew there was no sacrifice your dad wouldn’t have made for me and you kids, but I didn’t want him to have to give that up.”

“Stuff like that is why we were so freaked out about the reality show,” Dad says. “We know what this industry can do to people. We always tried to protect you kids from that.”

Mom reaches out and takes Dad’s hand. “You know what’s really crazy to me? How young you were when you guys started out.” She looks over at me. “I mean, he was basically the same age as Ash and Violet when Ransom got signed.”

I try to imagine someone Ash’s age being thrust into the crazy world of celebrity and fame. It was weird enough to wrap my mind around in my twenties.

“You know the only reason why it worked?” Dad asks, his eyes locking on me. “The only reason I got through it is because I had my brothers right there with me. And your Grandpa. And Uncle Levi.”

“Six Man Band,” I mutter. That’s the name they gave the record label and it’s a pretty apt description of Ransom—the brothers, their dad, and Levi. They always had each other’s backs, every single one of them essential in making Ransom what it was.

I thought June and I were so similar. We both came from famous families, both understood what it was like to see people you love in the gossip blogs and celebrity magazines. But that’s where the similarities end. June had Jimmy Cain and her dad and a mother who left. And I had…all of this.

“She called me this week,” I say, my voice ragged. “Twice. I didn’t answer.” I rub at my stinging eyes. “Fuck, I should have answered.”

“It’s okay to be upset about what happened, Fox,” my mom says. “Of course you were hurt when she went back to that guy.”

“I know. But being hurt doesn’t mean I should have cut her out like that. I left her completely alone. She doesn’t have people she can count on, not like we do.” I want to throw up. “I was supposed to be that for her.”

“It’s not too late, buddy,” my dad says. “If you think this girl is worth it, then it’s never too late.”

“Is she worth it?” my mom asks, and I can hear just the slightest sliver of doubt in her voice. She might have a lot more sympathy for June than she did before, but that doesn’t mean she’s totally on board. She doesn’t know June, not like I do. Very few people do. And God, how lucky does that make me?

“Did you notice that I stopped sending you script changes to read?” I ask and my mom nods. “That’s because June started doing it for me. She recorded all my lines so I could learn them.”

My mom’s eyebrows go up. “You told her?” Of course she’s surprised—I haven’t even told my siblings. Something that I need to change as soon as possible.

“I trust her.” I think about June running out into the ocean back in North Carolina, even though she was scared. June buying those books for the Littles, remembering all of the details I’d told her over the years. Planning that trip for Everly, wanting so badly to be accepted, to have friends. I think of June singing so badly at karaoke and laughing, happy just to be part of a group. June going up in that hot air balloon, terrified out of her mind, but still opening her eyes.

June, trying all summer to be just a little more brave.

“There’s something I need to do,” I say, standing suddenly. “I’ll see you guys later.”

“Wait,” Mom calls as I stride to the hallway. “You can’t just leave us hanging! What are you going to do?”

I stop for just a second to look over my shoulder. “I’ll let you know if it works.”