Page 102 of Good For Me

River

So this is what it feels like,I think to myself, running a finger down Jasmine’s bare arm. This is what it feels like to finally be exactly where I belong.

I’ve relived the night I spent with Jasmine last summer a thousand times in my head. Up until now, I’d rank that experience as the best moment of my life.

But what we just shared blows it out of the water.

She was different with me this time. There was no wall between us, no defenses erected to keep me out. She stared up into my eyes as I moved over her and I knew that she was feeling exactly the same thing I was—perfection.

That’s what we are together. Perfect.

It doesn’t matter that things are pretty screwed up at the moment. Doesn’t matter that I still haven’t figured out the job thing. Doesn’t matter that her uncle looked about ready to take me apart back at the bar. Or that it’s only a matter of time before my entire family knows and the gossip mill cranks up.

All of that is just noise. What matters is right here, the way we fit together. The way she feels in my arms. The trust and emotion I saw shining in her eyes when I made love to her.

Everything else? We can figure it out. Just so long as we end up right back here at the end of the day, I’m pretty sure there’s nothing we can’t do together.

“River,” she whispers against my chest.

“Mmm.” I tuck a lock of hair behind her ear, letting the ends slip through my fingers, luxuriating in the silky feel against my skin. How many times did I stare at her in her uncle’s bar and imagine what this hair would feel like?

“I’m sorry for what I said.”

I’m so sated and blissed out it takes a moment for the words to register. And another to realize I have no idea what she’s talking about.

“For what you said when?”

“At the bar.” She’s pressed close enough to my body that I can feel her swallow. “The night after we were together the first time.”

Oh. A familiar sting hits my chest, lessened considerably by the fact that she’s here with me right now, naked in my bed. But it’s hard to forget the way I’d felt that night, when she fucking obliterated all my hopes for what could possibly happen between us.

“It’s okay,” I manage to say. “You didn’t owe me anything, Jas.”

She shifts on the bed, and a big part of me wants to throw a temper tantrum when I feel her pulling away. But she grabs a pillow and tucks it up under her cheek, stretching out on her side to face me. I mirror the pose, studying her face. She looks regretful. Sad. The last two emotions I want her to be after what just happened.

“I did owe you, River. You were so good to me that night.”

I waggle my eyebrows, hoping to dispel some of the suddenly heavy mood emanating off her. “If I recall, we were both good to each other. Several times.”

She rolls her eyes, but my efforts work, because her lips are curving up into that almost smile she always gets when she’s amused by me but trying not to encourage me. I can picture her smiling just like that years down the road. God, I hope I get the chance to keep trying to make her laugh for that long.

“I’m serious,” she says. “And I’m not just talking about the sex. You were amazing that whole night. Taking me to Ruby’s, trying to cheer me up.” She sighs softly. “Honestly, it was one of the best nights I’d had in a long time.”

It was the best for me, too. But I don’t tell her that. Because the next day she’d pretty much crushed me and maybe I’m still a little more bitter about it than I thought.

“I was scared,” she murmurs, sounding embarrassed. “I liked you too much and it felt too fast. So I reacted badly and I’m sorry.”

I blow out a breath, trying to release the last of that bitterness along with it. “I forgive you on one condition.”

“What’s that?”

“You tell me more about this whole liking-me-too-much thing.”

She snorts a laugh. “You’re ridiculous, you know that?”

“I’m serious,” I insist. “I have low self-esteem, Jas, I need you to build me up a little here.”

She scoffs. “If you have low self-esteem, heaven help the rest of us.”