Page 109 of Darling Girls

‘I’ve. Been. Maligned,’ Miss Fairchild said.

Jessica mimicked her stance, leaning forward. Showing she wasn’t intimidated. ‘So you didn’t illegally procure a child, and then send her away when she didn’t meet your needs?’

Now Miss Fairchild groaned. ‘Listen to yourself.Procure! Meet my needs! Dramatising everything. You’re as bad as the media.’

The media had been swift in condemning Miss Fairchild. Rightly so. To someone as image-obsessed as she was, this was bound to drive her crazy.

‘Scott was the one who brought her to me. How was I supposed to know it wasn’t legal?’

Scott, it seemed from Miss Fairchild’s emails, was public enemy number one in her eyes. After Zara had named him as the one to facilitate her adoption, the police had brought him in. Once he’d realised he was going to jail, he hadn’t eventriedto protect the identities of those he’d worked with. He admitted to everything, but even so, he would be going away, and for a lot longer than Miss Fairchild.

‘I’m just sorry that we weren’t able to charge her with anything regarding her treatment of you three girls,’ Patel had told them just last week. The police had kept in touch over the past few months, and the sisters discovered the police weren’t the enemies they’d perceived them to be. ‘Unfortunately, with the house gone, and a lack of supportive evidence, it was very difficult to build a compelling case.’

In the end, it didn’t really matter. Miss Fairchild was paying the price regardless.

‘So you thought it was legal to return a child you’d planned to adopt and then pretend she never existed?’ Jessica said to her.

Miss Fairchild rolled her eyes. ‘Why are you even here if you’re just going along with the popular narrative that I’m a monster?’

Jessica wasn’t surprised that her former foster mother wasn’t accepting any responsibility for her actions. Still, there was something shocking about seeing how readily she could deflect guilt and paint herself as the victim.

‘I’m here because I want to understand something,’ Jessica told her.

‘What?’

‘I know you had a daughter named Amy when you were a teenager. Your stepfather killed her, as far as we know. Ten years later, you fostered me. Why? Was I meant to be a replacement for Amy?’

Miss Fairchild’s expression changed. She seemed thoughtful.

‘Not a replacement, no,’ she said. ‘No one could ever replace her. Maybe it was my attempt to make it up to her? When I returned to Wild Meadows after my mother and John died and heard that there was a little girl who needed me, it felt like a sign. A second chance.’ Miss Fairchild’s expression was so pure Jessica had to force herself to keep her guard up. ‘I’ll never forget the moment I saw you. The connection I felt. I loved you in an instant. And you loved me back!’

‘I did,’ Jessica acknowledged.

‘But then you started loving other people. Friends at school. Norah and Alicia.’

‘You brought all of them into my life. What was I supposed to do?’

‘You were supposed to loveme!’ Miss Fairchild cried, so loudly that the guard stepped forward and told her to keep her voice down. When she spoke again, her voice was softer. More miserable. ‘Norah didn’t love me. Alicia didn’t love me. The respite babies didn’t love me. Even my own mother found someone else to love. The only person who ever loved me and only me was Amy. My daughter.

‘It was Scott who suggested that instead of fostering I adopt a baby. He told me that for a rather large fee, he could fast-track an adoption with a healthy baby who would attach easily. He could even find one who looked like me, he said. I went along with it in good faith. I didn’t know the details.’

Jessica stared at her. ‘I assume you know the details now?’

Miss Fairchild just rolled her eyes.

‘Scott took kids from foster care and sold them,’ Jessica said. Miss Fairchild knew this, of course, but Jessica wanted to spell it out, so she had nowhere to hide. ‘He told the parents, usually vulnerable young women or parents from a non-English-speaking background, that they had lost custody permanently and would never see their kids again.’

Miss Fairchild shook her head, her lips pursed. ‘He took kids from parents who were ill-equipped to look after their babies. I would have given Amy a better life. But she decided she loved you girls more than me. It was so demoralising, Jessica.’

‘So yougave her away?’

‘I had no choice! You told me you were going to report me to the authorities. I called Scott. He came immediately and took Amy and placed her with another family – the family who raised her. I’m told they were good people. So it all worked out in the end.’

Jessica stared at her. ‘It didn’twork out. Zara wasstolenfrom her birth parents. Sold to you and then to another family. She has been displaced and a set of parents lost their child!’

Miss Fairchild shrugged. ‘What was I supposed to do?’

‘You were supposed to be an adult!’ Jessica cried, ‘and do the right thing! You were supposed to provide security, consistency and love! If you weren’t capable of that, you had no business having children in your care.’