Page 120 of Demon's Beauty

Nothing is sacred to my father. Nothing is off-limits in advancing the family’s position or gaining us even one more ounce of power.

But he’ll stay away from my mate.

He ruined his own marriage, drove his wife away with his ambition. He won’t have the same opportunity to ruin what I have with Soleil.

Even if it means finally discovering the end to his goodwill. Even if it means finding out just where my value to him as a son and as a Nighfall ends, and his ruthless dedication to his own ambition begins.

If it means keeping him far, far away from Soleil, I’d give it all up in a heartbeat.

“And you’ll what?” he asks with derisive sneer. “Offer her a life of penury and struggle because you have no money of your own and no livelihood other than the one I give you?”

Hot shame creeps up the back of my neck. “I have trained as a—”

“As a lawyer.” Somehow, he finds a way to drip even more toxic disgust and disappointment into his tone. “Oh, yes, how could I have forgotten? And pray tell, who will have you as a member of their firm? Your brother Eoghan certainly won’t once he hears of your intransigence. Be honest with yourself, son, what kind of life can you offer her without the comfort and stability I have afforded you all these years?”

He’s right.

I hate it down to the very marrow of my bones, but he’s right.

I’ve spent my life suckling at the family teat, enjoying the freedom my father’s money bought me, and I have nothing to show for it.

Nothing but a lifetime beholden to him.

Nothing for myself.

Nothing even remotely good enough for her.

My fleeting bravado fades, replaced by that same deep sickness, the dread that’s been hounding me since the moment I found out I had a mate and had to come to terms with the fact I’ve never done anything that could make me remotely worthy of her.

“We are not having this conversation.” My father stands and strides across the room without leaving me any time to respond, though I have no idea what I’d even say. “I’m leaving for Traverdale today, and I’ll return tomorrow afternoon. I will talk to you again when you’re reasonable, when you’ve had enough time to remember who you are and what you owe to this family.”

He reaches the office door, and words stick on my tongue.

Too many words.

To many things I want to say, but can’t.

And it’s too late anyway as he pulls open the door and steps through without another word or a single backward glance, leaving me standing there alone, feeling more like a failure than ever.

I stay there longer than I care to admit, stewing in my misery, until a tug in the center of my chest pulls me back to the present.

A tug so sharp it takes my breath away.

Edged with my witch’s magick and the unmistakable bitterness of her fear, her dismay, her panic, it barely takes me half a heartbeat to act.

I open a portal and go to her, the only worthwhile thing I’m still able to do.

36

Soleil

My heartbeat pounds in my ears as I walk down the corridor back to Vayla’s workshop, the same question circling round and round.

What do I want? What do I want? What do I want?

What I really want is more time to decide, more time to think, to not have this deadline looming over my head.

Only… that wouldn’t really help, would it? It would just be kicking the can, giving myself more time to ruminate and tie myself into knots instead of making a damn decision.