Page 162 of Librarian

“I can’t do it.”

I don’t realise I’ve spoken aloud until Leo steps closer. I wait for him to tell me it’s not that bad, to logic me out of my reluctance. It’s unfair to expect him to do it when he loves the Library as much as I do, if not more.

“Okay.”

I blink at him.

“You’re better at keeping Kyrith distracted anyway.” He offers me the lifeline.

I can’t help it; I hug him so hard his feet come off the floor. He’s still so skinny that I can feel his bones protesting my enthusiasm, but he’s doing better than he was.

“We can treat her to Chinese food tonight,” I say, already plotting the best way to cheer her up, because she’ll hate this more than I do. “She’s not had that yet, right? Or do you think she’d rather have more pizza?”

Both will help Leo pack on a few extra calories.

“Chinese,” North decides. “Now, what are we doing?”

That’s my cue to leave.

I look back at Leo as I pass them, checking silently to make sure this is really okay. He smiles, offering me a nod.

Magic, I really love having a big brother.

The reminder makes the envelope in my pocket burn a little hotter as I walk away. Because not only did my dad keep Leo’s existence from me, he actively hid it.

I draw the letter out as soon as I’m far enough that he won’t see it, shoving the box that it was wrapped around back into my pants as I turn the paper over in my hands. At eleven years old, Leo’s handwriting was already neater than mine will ever be. My name and address is right there.

And the envelope is unopened.

Because my dad took one look at the return address and chucked it in a drawer.

I get that he wanted to protect me, but it means that Leodidtry to tell me I was his brother. He tried before I even knew he existed. Now I’m kind of scared to see what he wrote.

My thumb catches on the seal, ripping through the old glue with zero effort. I pull out a piece of paper that looks like it was carefully torn from an old school exercise book.

I’m going to take care of Kyrith, but first, I have to know what this says.

Our girl findsme sitting on the floor, curled around the letter, sobbing my eyes out.

“Lambert, what the…?” She drops to her knees beside me, hands fluttering like she can’t decide whether to hug me or give me space.

In answer, I hold up the thing that set me off.

“He sent me a Pokémon card. I didn’t even know he existed, and he was sending me his best card, because big brothers share their favourite toys.”

Her huge eyes grow wider as she looks at the card in my hand, then down at the letter in my lap. Too late, I realise she probably has no idea what it even is.

“It’s a game—” I cut off. “He sent me a good card. A shiny. This would’ve been…I would’ve thought it was so cool.”

Okay, I don’t know that for sure. I would’ve been seven. For all I know, I would’ve lost it or chewed on it or something. That’s not the point. “I would’ve loved anything he sent me.”

“It was a good gift.” She settles her back against the shelf beside me. “You deserved to know him as your brother.”

“No. He even said we probably can’t be friends—” I choke up. “We can’t be friends until his curse goes away, but he's going to try really hard not to like me until that happens, so I can be safe.”

Kyrith’s gaze goes liquid with sadness, and she drags me against her chest, cradling my head as her fingers run through my hair.

“I wanted a brother so much.” My heart hurts. “I…I had friends, but… And he didn’t even know. He thought I read it and never replied, but it was in some stupid drawer, and my dad didn’t even mention—” I suck in air. “Why would he never?—?”