Page 20 of Defend Her Heart

There’s no way it’s her.

“She’s sitting directly across from you. When I go to put your order in, you should try to get her attention. I bet two people who share the love of pineapple on pizza might hit it off. And you could use a friend.”

I ignore the jab and mentally urge him to get the fuck out of my way to see if it’s her.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity, Johnny walks back toward the kitchen and my heart thumps in my chest at the sight. Sitting in a barstool, her short black hair tucked behind her ears, a glass in hand, is Avery.

She hasn’t noticed me yet, her eyes locked on one of the TV screens hanging above the bar and I take this rare moment to look at her unabashedly. Those beautiful green eyes track whatever’s happening on the screen, her brow furrowing when something happens she must not like.

It doesn’t matter how much time goes by, I can still read her. Every look, every shift in her expression…I know exactly what she’s feeling, like my body never forgot her language.

I exhale quietly.

Maybe that’s what’s bothering me so much. Because thereissomething different now, like when I saw her at the barbecue. Something I can’t translate. I don’t know what led her to take a job in Green Bay, or what she’s carrying that’s heavy enough to have her walking out of Katie’s office. I’d give anything to understand the pieces of her that I lost—no, that I pushed away. It’s killing me, sitting here across from her like a stranger, not knowing the parts of her that matter most.

As if my thoughts call out to her, her attention moves down from the TV to me. Her eyes narrow, and I watch as herlips twist, a clear sign that she is most definitely not happy to see me here.

I should leave her alone. I should walk out of here and give her the space she so clearly wants from me.

Pushing my stool away from the bar, I plan to do just that. My body moves toward the exit and I have every intention of telling the hostess I’ll take my food to go and wait outside.

But when I get to the corner of the bar, my mind starts screaming at me.

What if this is my last chance to talk to Avery alone? She’s been doing a pretty good job of avoiding me since she got here, but maybe she just doesn’t know what to do. I sure as hell don’t. Maybe I’ll try talking to her one more time, and if she asks me to leave or clearly doesn’t want me here, I’ll respect her wishes and back off completely. But I can’t walk out of here without giving it one more try.

I turn right, then right again, not stopping until I’m pulling out the stool next to Avery’s. I take a seat and rest my elbow on the bar. Taking a deep breath, I shoot my shot.

“Funny seeing you here.”

“Funny is not the word I would use. Did you follow me here?” I swear, if I could figure out how, I’d be shooting lasers out of my eyes at the man sitting next to me.

This is unbelievable. After running into Connor at the arena and standing up to him, all I wanted was to decompress with an entire pizza to myself. When I texted Sadie asking if she knew of a good pizza place close by, she told me I needed to come here immediately. I never would have come here if I knew there was a chance that Connor would show up.

Connor smirks at my accusation. “If I was following you, don’t you think I would’ve been in here sooner?”

Damn. He’s got a point. So this is just the universe playing a cruel and unusual joke on me by putting us in the same place at the same time.

It’s something I know I’m going to have to get used to considering we now work at the same place. Although, I’ve done a pretty good job of avoiding him at the rink over the past few weeks since the season started. But anything outside of work? Well, I’d rather not bump into him if I can help it.

“Fine. You didn’t follow me. Now, why are you sitting next to me when there’s a barstool with your name on it that youjust vacated? On theother side of the bar.” I emphasize my last comment, hoping like hell he’ll leave me alone and go back to where he was just sitting.

He seems to consider my question for a moment, moving both elbows to the bar now where he rests his hands under his chin. After a few seconds of silence, I think he’s decided to just ignore me when he turns to look at me.

“I know it’s been some time since we last spoke or saw each other?—”

“Over two years,” I cut him off.

“Right. It’s been over two years. And I’m sorry for that.”

I scoff and turn my attention away from him. I can’t look at him when he is so clearly lying straight to my face. If he was sorry, he would’ve reached out at some point. He didn’t even think about me until I showed up at the team barbecue over the summer.

“Avery. Please look at me.” The sincerity in his voice hits a place deep inside of me that causes me to turn my head slightly. The gold rim around his pupils is all I see when I finally make eye contact with him.

“I am sorry. Things were just…complicated back then. I made choices I thought were best for my mental health. Unfortunately, those choices meant leaving some important things, and people, behind.”

His mental health? In all the years I’ve known Connor, from dating in high school to catching up in college with all of our mutual friends, I’ve never known Connor to be open about his emotions. At first, talking to him about anything deep was like pulling teeth, but eventually he started opening up to me about things.

But now here he is, giving me the smallest crumb about what caused his abrupt exit from my life two years ago. We weren’t close by any means after he broke my heart, but he was still a part of my life. He still showed up to every reunionwith our old friends, every big life event one of them might be having. He was still Connor.