Page 75 of All For You

“I’m so sorry.”

He touched his heart. “I still feel a stab right here thinking about how my mother reacted. It bothered me how she passed without me redeeming myself in her eyes. And it bothers me I craved their approbation. It was a stupid yearning that would lead nowhere. It was never going to happen.”

“They’re our parents. We can’t help but want their praise, for them to be proud of us.”

I didn’t know if he wanted to be comforted, but impulsively, I wound my arms around his waist and squeezed hard.

“You don’t have to talk about it anymore if you don’t want to,” I murmured into his chest, which was pounding with his stricken heart.

He pulled me closer and lifted my chin. “I want to talk about it. With you. To be honest, I’ve never spoken about the whole terrible mess to anyone. Not even to Wills, because the deal is, I take care of him and he doesn’t have to worry about me. I told him I was pleased Sophia showed her true colors, not the way it unfolded, and that I never thought I was in love with her.”

“Was that true? Were you not in love with her?”

“I thought I was at the time. I know now, since my weekend at the Amor Inn…I wasn’t.”

Was that…? Surely that awareness wasn’t because ofme? He looked as though he was holding back.

“That’s when I realized, too, the friends I’d made back at the clubhouse when I was a kid were the last real friends I’d made. Suffice it to say, Sophia was never interested in any of them. That’s why the clubhouse at West City is so important to me.”

I nodded. That gave me an insight into him. His childhood friends meant a lot to him, he didn’t value status like Sophia had, and he wanted to do good in his world. He felt so alone; he hadn’t been able to talk to anyone about his fiancée leaving with his best friend, anguish and sorrow trapped inside him. “Do you ever bump into them, Sophia and Sebastian?”

“They live in London. She’s in marketing, and Sebastian’s a big-time lawyer. But he’s not in property, so no, I don’t come across them. I don’t even want to hear about them, but sometimes he’s in the papers for his high-profile court cases, representing entertainers and politicians.”

Sebastian. Lawyer in the papers. “You’re not talking about Sebastian Seymour, are you?” I asked.

“Yes, him.”

“You’re right. There’s no avoiding him if you read the news. Also, because he’s very…”Hot.I trailed off, not wanting to rub salt into the wounds.

“Because he’s dashing. You can say it.” He gave a rueful smile. “Honestly, I’ve pretended to myself I wouldn’t care if I saw them again, but the truth is, I avoid the smart bars around the Law Courts on the Strand, where I’m pretty sure they hang out.”

“I totally get that. Mine is nothing as heart-wrenching. My breakup was amicable, but it felt like a failure, and I avoided thewhole east part of my village so I wouldn’t run into my ex. I was so relieved when he got a job transfer and left town.”

He nodded in understanding. “I don’t have any interest in seeing them again. Like I said, my good opinion, once lost, is lost forever.”

In this instance, completely understandable.

“Look, I don’t want to waste any more time talking about them.” He raked a hand through his hair. “I’ve made a complete mess of everything, Lizzy. Again, I’m so sorry for what I said to you that weekend and what I did to your sister. My brother has been utterly miserable, and my manipulation of the situation and putting him off pursuing Jane has seriously damaged my relationship with Wills.”

We both stood there as heat bloomed in my chest. I wanted to start over with Darcy. At times, he’d made me feel special and desired. His upbringing had shaped him in certain ways I better understood, and I saw a man who wanted to be better. I wanted the chance to explore that more, but he needed to fully prove himself. There wasn’t an us…yet. I felt the same feelings I’d felt at the inn, but I didn’t want to rush. I wanted to make sure this time he was all he seemed. Jane’s happiness would hopefully be restored—that was what I needed for now.

“In the meantime, I would love you to stay for dinner,” he said. “Both you and Tabitha?” Amusement tugged at his mouth. “Promise I won’t be cooking.”

I laughed. Yes, I wanted to stay for dinner. I wanted to see him more in his natural habitat.

“I would love to,” I said. “Can I check what Tabitha wants to do this evening?”

“Yes, of course.” He reached out and stopped me with a soft hand on my arm. “Lizzy, I’m so happy you’re here.”

“Are you?” I smiled.

He stepped toward me and gently, naturally, reached out and slid his knuckles over mine. His light touch sent shivers of delight up my arms and short-circuited my brain, which could only hammer out,more, more.

“Yes, I am.” He took both my hands and swung them a little. “And especially now I’ve found out we both love warblers.”

“Ah, yes, the warblers.” I nodded sagely.

He lightly rubbed his thumbs over the soft part of my wrists. Smoothed circles into my skin, round and round, gentle then firmer, until I wasmelting. Until my knees weakened and I wanted to sink under his touch. If that was what his mere thumbs did, I couldn’t imagine what havoc the rest of his tightly ridged body could do wrapped around me. I shivered.