Page 5 of Hellhound AU

“Yeah, but that’s like a decade in attempted arson years.”

He blushed, his face almost matching his hair. My god, the man was adorable.

Marcy chose that moment to walk over and ask what we wanted to order. I flip-flopped between the tuna salad and the caesar salad wrap, but I finally settled on tuna. Rowan ordered the caesar salad wrap, and then Marcy took our menus and went off toward the kitchen.

Rowan’s phone started dinging, and we both looked at where he’d set it on the table. The messages were from someone named Riley, and Rowan groaned when he saw the name.

“Ex?” I asked.

“Worse. Sister,” he answered.

“Oh. I wouldn't know. I’m an only child. I always thought it would be nice to have siblings, though. I can’t imagine a sister being worse than my ex, anyway.”

Rowan tilted his head at me. “Bad breakup?”

Marcy brought out our sandwiches at that moment, and then Rowan did thesweetestthingever. He took half of his and switched it for half of mine. I beamed at him, but he only grunted in response. He was like a giant red-headed teddy bear.

“Oh. My. God. You are thesweetestman on the face of the earth, and I think maybe we should get married.” I took a bite of my wrap, groaning in approval.

Rowan looked mildly disturbed, but he picked up his wrap and took a bite. His phone dinged again, but he studiously ignored it. When it started playing “Bad Reputation,” I reached over and picked up the phone.

“Hello. This is Rowan’s phone,” I said.

Rowan looked mortified, but he didn’t reach over to grab the phone. There was silence on the other end of the line, then a female voice asked, “Who is this?”

“Milo,” I answered. “I’m currently eating lunch with Rowan, and we split the caesar salad and tuna wraps because your brother is a giant teddy bear.”

Rowan looked shocked at that, but his sister replied, “Rowan doesn’t like tuna.”

“O. M. G.” I dragged out. “That makes itevensweeter.” I looked at Rowan. “Oh, boo, you don’t even like tuna and you still split with me?”

Rowan looked like a deer caught in headlights, so I went back to the phone call. “Anywho, we’re gonna finish lunch, then I might drag Rowan with me to threaten an abusive husband, so he’ll have to call you back later. Thanks! Bye!”

I hung up before she could do more than sputter, then I took another bite of my wrap, groaning at the taste.

“Mmmm. These are so good,” I said when I finished chewing. “Come on, eat up. Abusive husbands don’t threaten themselves, you know.”

Rowan didn’t answer, but the man did take a bite of his wrap, so I considered it a win.

3

Author’s Note:

I’m sorry to inform you that this chapter came off without a hitch and I had a perfectly normal week. Well, Jude did get arrested (sort of), Fluffy went all fiery, and I think a few people were probably murdered. But still, a pretty normal week.

PS: Did you know that if you search how heavy a bomb is or how heavy enough explosives to destroy a cabin would weigh, the search engine actually WILL NOT ANSWER YOU. An author just needs to find out how to blow up a cabin, and the internet won’t help. But don’t worry, my boo’s brothers came through and were able to answer the question. I don’tthinkthey blew up any real buildings in the process. (No guarantees, though.)

ROWAN

Milo had hung up on Riley. I stared at the phone like it was going to grow teeth and bite me. People didnothang up on Riley. My sister was vicious.

I took a bite of the tuna wrap, trying not to wince at the flavor. At least the tuna here had pickles in it; that was probably the only reason I was still eating the damn thing.

Milo was grinning maniacally at me, like I had just shit rainbows because I’d eaten some tuna.

“Don’t look so nervous,” Milo said. “Your sister seemed perfectly lovely.”

I almost choked on the wrap, but I managed to swallow the bite in my mouth. We ate the rest of the meal in silence, but it was a weirdly comfortable silence. Maybe because Milo kept looking up at me and smiling, like I was doing something right just by eating the wrap. I had to choke down the tuna, but the caesar salad one was actually really tasty.