Page 123 of Queen of the Shadow

“No. She may stay.” Scáthach’s gaze remained on the one warrior in the boat who still faced Dunscáith. His tricolor hair blazed as a sunbeam caught him.

“Mama, were you tempted to go with him?” her daughter asked.

“No, Fry, I was not. I was tempted to ask him to stay.”

“That would have ended badly,” said Tabiti as she joined them on the dock.

“Which is why I did not ask him.”

“We’ll leave you alone now, Mama,” said Uathach.

“We will be in the inner ward drilling the students,” said Tabiti. “If you need us.”

Scáthach nodded, but kept her gaze focused on the boat, which had reached the ship. She watched Cuchulainn’s blazing hair as he climbed into the ship and made his way quickly to the stern, where he remained, facing Dunscáith, until he disappeared into the blue horizon.

Only then did Scáthach allow her legs to crumble. She sat on the end of the dock, put her arms around Leannan’s neck, and sobbed her heartbreak into the dog’s warm fur. Her tears ran down the dog’s coat, through the wooden slats of the dock, and into the sea, which soon began to churn. Waves battered the dock, but Scáthach did not loosen her grip on Leannan. She understood her loyal sturgeons had rushed to her and she would acknowledge them, but at that moment she just needed to weep.

“Oh, my precious girl. I should not have stayed away so long.” Her mother’s voice wrapped around her, and then Béfionn was there, striding out of the sea to engulf Scáthach and Leannan in her warm embrace.

Chapter 28

Sentanta watched until he could no longer see her, and then he continued staring back at the isle, the castle, and the woman who had forever changed him, wishing... wondering... hoping...

* * *

Béfionn gently wiped the tears from Scáthach’s cheeks. “Sometimes we just need to cry them out of our hearts,” said the goddess.

Scáthach sniffed, wiped her nose with the back of her sleeve, and asked, “That actually works?”

Her mother stroked back her hair gently. “No, precious girl. What works is time and the understanding that the choice you made was wise.”

“It didn’t feel like I had a choice,” Scáthach admitted.

“That’s only because you are wise and independent. Do you know how many women would have believed they didn’t have a choice either, which means they would have given up their lives and chased after that man?” The goddess sat cross-legged facing her daughter. Leannan was curled at Béfionn’s side. One of the goddess’s hands rested on her wide head. Béfionn met her daughter’s gaze. “But I know how painful it is to choose to love yourself and your own life over losing yourself to another.”

“Doing the right thing isn’t easy,” said Scáthach. “Mother, I want you to know Cuchulainn isn’t a bad man.”

“Of course he isn’t. Beloved daughter, a lesser man couldn’t have won your love.” The goddess’s lips tilted up in a smile. “And the Underworld has told me tales of your Sentanta. The realms liked him. And I like his puppy.”

Scáthach brightened. “The pup! You’ve seen him?”

“Of course. I sent the dog’s spirit to the Autumnal Realm for Cuchulainn. Oh, and I’ve seen your stallion, too. He and the pup are inseparable.”

“I told Cuchulainn you were behind the berserker dog.” She paused and added, “The dog wasn’t there long, was he?”

“He was a good dog. He slept until you and your warrior arrived. To him it seemed he had only just been killed.” She cocked her head, studying Scáthach. “Did it work? Was Cuchulainn able to accept the berserker?”

“You know Cuchulainn will call the berserker again?”

“I know Lugh, so yes, I know Cuchulainn will call the berserker again. I didn’t want the Hero of Ulster’s short life to be any more miserable than his choices have already made him.”

“Thank you.” Scáthach’s brow furrowed. “You know everything that happened in the Underworld?”

“Yes, though I did not ask for details on some of the... events that happened at night.” Béfionn ruffled Leannan’s ears. “You did good work opening Valhalla to those spirits. You judged the man obsessed with the child correctly, and it was compassionate to send the stallion and pup to the Summerlands before you entered the Winterlands.”

When Béfionn said nothing more, Scáthach frowned. “And what of Curruid?”

“Curruid is what began my journey here to you today.” The goddess reached out and stroked her daughter’s cheek. “And your tears were what hastened my arrival.”