Page 66 of A Mismatch Made in London

I swallowed past the lump in my throat.

“May I kiss you?” he asked.

I should say no. There were so many reasons to sayNo, you may not kiss me.Instead, I said, “Yes.”

I shouldn’t let him kiss me if we might possibly release each other from the engagement, but that thought was lost when his lips touched mine.

His lips were almost magical, the way they made every part of me feel all tingly and alive. How could I ever have thought I might love anyone else but Jeremy Beaumont?

How could I think I loved Jeremy Beaumont?

When our lips parted, he was gazing down at me with the tenderest look in his eyes.Oh, heavens.Was this what it was like to be loved?

But this wasJeremy Beaumont.He couldn’t love me. I was sure he didn’t. Or I had been sure.

I was not ready for this. It was all wrong.

“Forgive me,” I mumbled. “I shouldn’t have said yes, as I am still so unsure of my feelings.”

“It is I who should ask forgiveness.”

We stood near each other. I kept my gaze on the floor as I tried to sort out my thoughts.

A few moments later, he said, “I want to apologize for kissing you at Lady Everson’s ball. It was wrong of me and must have surprised you very much, as we were not engaged.”

His words angered me. Was he saying he was sorry for kissing me because it caused him to be forced to ask me to marry him?

“Why do you say it was wrong?” I demanded.

He hesitated, then said, “It was ungentlemanly behavior.”

I couldn’t argue with that, but ... “Why did you do it? Why did you kiss me?” It was the question that was foremost in my mind.

“Why did you let me?”

Heat shot up my neck and into my face. I sucked in a loud breath.

“Forgive me. I should not—”

“No, you are right. I was wrong to let you kiss me. You did not force yourself upon me. I allowed it to happen, and for thatIwas wrong.”

“Forgive me, I did not intend to accuse—”

“Yes, you did. You want me to share the blame, and I do. But that does not mean I wished to marry you.” So now he knew that I wanted to kiss him, a man I didn’t intend to marry.

“Forgive me. The fault was mine and mine alone. As a gentleman, it is my responsibility to protect the lady in my presence, and I failed to do so.”

“Is that why you asked me to marry you? Because you are sorry you didn’t protect me? You feel responsible for possibly ruining my reputation? Well, I absolve you. I take the blame. You are absolved.”

We stood in silence for a moment as I tried to control my breathing. I wasn’t sure why I was so angry.

“Forgive me. I did not mean to insinuate that I was sorry I asked you to marry me, or even sorry I kissed you, for I wanted to kiss you, and I want to marry you.”

I tried to think how I could be angry about what he had just said, but I couldn’t.

“Mrs. Kendall!” we heard Juliet exclaim from the hallway outside the closed door.

I took a step away from him, though Jeremy seemed reluctant to let me; he kept hold of my hand. “Thank you for not breaking the engagement, for giving me a chance to show you that I love you,” he said.