Page 64 of A Mismatch Made in London

“And to think, my own niece has made a match with the Season’s most eligible gentleman. Just when I thought you might not make a match at all.”

“Perhaps the less said the better,” I whispered to my aunt. “There are sure to be some broken hearts in the room, and we don’t wish to crow too loudly and make them feel worse.”

“Oh, yes, you are right, my dear. Very true. How thoughtful you are.”

“We can speak about it at home.”

“Yes, quite right.”

Jeremy returned with lemonade and tea cakes, which I ate. I didn’t know what else to do with myself. No gentleman would ask me to dance with Jeremy Beaumont hovering over me and the room buzzing with the news that we had just got engaged. And dancing with Jeremy Beaumont just made me nervous. Orwas it confusion? Or maybe I was feeling angry. But I was at least as angry at myself as at him.

I would need to sort out my feelings later when I was alone. For now I had to keep smiling and pretending. There was nothing else I could do in front of all these people.

When the ball was over and my aunt and I were waiting for the carriage, Juliet and Jeremy approached me.

“We will call on you tomorrow.” Juliet was smiling, but I could see she wasn’t quite sure what to make of our engagement. And of course, she was still worried about her brother dueling with Fairweather.

I might have been worried about the duel if my anger hadn’t started to overcome my other emotions. When Jeremy bid me a good night, was I supposed to fawn over him like someone who was in love with him? I wouldn’t do it.

“Good night, Miss Moore,” he said.

I nearly said sarcastically, “Shouldn’t you call me ‘my love,’ or at least ‘Amelia’?”

But “Good night” was all I said.

What was to become of me and my dreams of true love?

All night I wrestled with thoughts and feelings. If only I had not let Jeremy Beaumont kiss me, I could have been sleeping peacefully. But then, if those ladies had walked in while I was trying to talk Jeremy into not fighting, we would have still been in trouble. Kissing only made it worse.

If only I hadn’t let Juliet talk me into trying to convince Jeremy not to fight. Hadn’t Juliet realized that she’d left us alone together at a ball where anyone might walk in and see us? For that matter, why hadn’t I realized it? Why hadn’t I insisted Juliet stay until I could finish talking to him?

Eventually I decided it was Fairweather’s fault for being eviland assaulting Juliet. None of this would have happened if he had not made Jeremy feel as if he had to fight the man for the honor of his sister.

And what if he was killed in the duel at dawn? Whenever there was a duel, one or even both of the participants could be killed.

My more complicated feelings, however, were what really kept me awake. Did I love Jeremy Beaumont? The answer was almost certainly no, since I’d always disliked him, and how can you love someone you disliked? Did he love me? He couldn’t possibly, as he’d always disliked me as well. Besides, he hadn’t told me he loved me even while asking me to marry him. No, he was only trying to do the honorable thing.

I had to admit, he was an honorable man, on the whole. But how did I feel about him offering to marry me just to protect his honor and my reputation? I didn’t like it. That much I was certain of. How would I ever fall in love now? He had ruined my life’s hope.

The most complicated thing of all was how I felt about him not loving me. But that didn’t even matter. I refused to think about that.

Now I had a decision to make, which was whether to break the engagement and when.

The beginning of calling hours was generally accepted to be ten o’clock in the morning, but Juliet and Jeremy were announced at nine-thirty.

I felt tears sting my eyes. Until that moment I hadn’t realized how worried I’d been that he had been killed.

As they entered the room, I tried to read Jeremy’s expression. He was serious, and I believe I detected a bit of nervousness in the way he held himself.

Juliet, however, was all smiles, and she hurried toward me, hands outstretched. “I am so overjoyed that my two favorite people are to be married. You are to be my sister, and I am so glad.”

I took her hands in mine and let her invest me with her smiles.

A servant interrupted us to say, “Mrs. Kendall says she will be down directly but not to wait for her.”

Mrs. Kendall knew that we no longer needed a chaperone, now that we were engaged, and I was certain she would take her time.

I looked at Jeremy and asked, “Did you duel?”