Page 90 of The Good Fortune of Miss Robbins

“Never. I never . . .” Lord Brookhaven said. “Let me explain.”

I wanted to hear his explanation, to understand how this made any sense, but at the same time, I could feel the flood of tears starting to sting my eyes. I turned and hurried from the room.

As I entered the hall, Lord Brookhaven caught me by the arm.

I kept my back to him while I wiped my face. I said, “Explain.”

“I wanted ... I wanted you to know what it was like to have a fortune of your own. I wanted you to be able to choose for yourself, to enjoy having the wherewithal to experience life in society. You had so few choices in life, and I wanted to give you that.”

“But why? Was this some kind of . . . twisted entertainment? To see what I would do? To see what would happen?”

“No, not at all. I—”

“And why, pray tell? What would you have done if I had accepted Mr. Welton’s marriage proposal, or Mr. Merritt’s? Would you have sent Mr. Sullivan to me with a woman you had hired and told me that the rightful heir had just shown up? So that you could demand the fortune be returned to you and see if my fiancé would marry me anyway? Was that the plan?”

“No, of course not.”

“There is no ‘of course not,’ for I never would have believed you capable of deceiving me with a fake uncle and a fake inheritance.”

“The money was yours. You could do whatever you wished with it. I never planned to take it back. You weren’t supposed to ever find out it came from me.”

“I see.”

I did not see.

“So you just gave me a fortune for no reason. You created a grand, elaborate scheme to give away a huge sum of money, and for what reason? I cannot imagine. How would you explain it? How?”

I was nearly hysterical, and I knew it was unbecoming, which was why I kept my face turned partially away from him and didn’t look him in the eye. But he stepped in front of me.

“I am sorry if this has hurt you, but—”

“No, you are not allowed to say ‘if this has hurt you.’ You have no right.” I was sobbing now. I felt embarrassed, but more than that, I felt manipulated and deceived.

He just stood there like a fish that had been caught and dragged onto dry land.

I pointed my finger at his face, not caring how rude it was. “I will return the fortune to you, every farthing. I am no one’s plaything.”

I stomped out the front door and walked home as fast as I could, my thoughts going every possible direction, feeling as if nothing made sense. Nothing. But now I knew that the large inheritance that I’d had such difficulty believing was real ... wasn’t. And my hope of making a love match felt impossible now. And worst of all, I’d promised to keep Joshua and Sarah safe, and I could no longer keep that promise.

I couldn’t possibly keep Lord Brookhaven’s fifty thousand pounds. Why had he given me that fortune, why? At his own expense and the expense of his own heirs? He’d shown so little interest in me that I’d given up hope of him asking me to marry him.

That’s not true. I knew deep down that was, in part, why I had rejected Mr. Welton, Mr. Merritt, and Lord Markeley. I’d been hoping that Lord Brookhaven might love me. I’d flirted and danced with other men, but he was the one I was thinking of.

And now I couldn’t stand the thought of seeing him again.

Finally, I reached my own door—although it wouldn’t be my door for much longer. I stepped inside and raced up the stairs to my room to cry in peace.

Over and over in my head came the words,No one will loveme now. And,What will become of Joshua and Sarah,after I promised to give them a home?

This was an unmitigated disaster. What had he been thinking, giving her that fortune?

William paced back and forth in the drawing room, Lady Derringer looking on.

“I know you don’t want to hear this, but I did tell you something like this would happen.”

The only thing saving Lady Derringer’s life right now was that she looked distraught, because if she’d looked snide or triumphant...

“Not helpful,” he said.