Page 56 of The Good Fortune of Miss Robbins

He wasn’t so sure. “She’s not the kind of woman who only cares about my rank and my money.” Besides, she might think he was too self-conceited, which he was, and too ... discontented. And he wasn’t sure he could change.

“You want her to fall in love with you,” Lady Derringer said matter-of-factly. “Then court her. Take her for drives, escort her to concerts and theatricals, call on her every day and tell her pretty words.”

Perhaps she was right. But he needed to be sure that she loved him. He’d been hurt and humiliated before. Besides, Miss Robbins would wish to marry the man with the strongest character, especially since she had fifty thousand pounds and could choose anyone, and William’s temperament was often gruff, melancholy, and just plain irritable.

It would be good if he could become a better person, and quickly.

His fears made him want to wait, to truly get to know her character, to know that fortune could not change her. He’d thought he knew her when they’d walked around his gardens at Lowndesbury House, when he’d received her weekly reports about the children’s progress, and he’d seen it at the house party with a few guests. She’d comported herself well.

But hadn’t he also been sure about Letitia?

Lady Derringer had said he should court Miss Robbins, spend time with her and say flattering things to her—and he wanted to. But every time he thought about making his intentions known, there was a part of him that stopped him, that forced him to keep her at arm’s length, and he didn’t know how to conquer it. Or even if he should.

Eighteen

I danced several more dances, each time with a different gentleman. I smiled and drank lemonade and danced some more, always aware of Lord Brookhaven, who never danced at all.

Why had he given this ball? He stood near the wall, scowling, barely speaking to anyone. Meanwhile, I danced with every gentleman who asked me. It was what ladies did, and I seemed to be in demand as a dance partner, as much as any other lady in the room.

One gentleman in particular was quite attentive—Mr. Welton. He asked me to dance before many of the guests had even arrived, fetched me lemonade, and seemed always eager to whisper some bit of gossip in my ear. Later in the evening, he asked me to dance again. While we danced the second time, he flirted shamelessly, making me laugh and leaning his head quite close to mine while gazing into my eyes. It was a bit disconcerting. But mostly, it just made me feel alive and ... pretty.

Logically, I told myself that the men who flirted and asked me to dance were only doing it because of my fifty thousand pounds, but it was something I was not accustomed to, and I’d hardly be human if I didn’t enjoy it.

Lord Brookhaven appeared at my side. His face was serious, though not quite so hard and angry as it had looked for most of the night. “Do you have a partner for the last dance?”

“No.”

“Would you do me the honor?”

“Of course.”

The musicians were preparing to play, and Lord Brookhaven led me onto the floor. While we stood there waiting for other couples to join us, he said, “I wish to put you on your guard about Mr. Welton. He’s a scoundrel of the first order and is only after the lady with the largest fortune. You’d do well to stay clear of him.”

I said nothing as the music started and we moved in a round with the other couples.

But the more I thought about what he said, the angrier I felt. I’d waited all night to dance with him, and this was the only thing he said to me? How dare he suggest that Mr. Welton could only be interested in me for my fortune! Did he think that I had no merit or worth on my own?

Tears stung my eyes. It was true—no one would have danced or flirted with me if I had not inherited a fortune. I’d be shunned and ignored if not for the money, a poor orphan, nobody at all, exactly as I’d been during Lord Brookhaven’s house party. It hurt even more that Lord Brookhaven had been the one to point this out.

He was probably just trying to be a good friend. He couldn’t know how much it hurt, especially coming from him.

And he hadn’t danced with me or talked with me all night, only now asking me to dance when he couldn’t possibly ask me for a second dance. We danced in silence.

When it was over and everyone was politely applauding the musicians, Lord Brookhaven said, “I hope you are not angry with me for wishing to put you on your guard.”

I wasn’t angry with him forthat, but ... “I don’t understand why you think a gentleman could not wish to know me for myself. Am I so odious that my fortune is the only thing about me that could interest a man?”

I should not be saying such things, but it was as if saying them scratched an unignorable itch.

I’d probably regret it later, though.

I could also see how my words affected him. His lips parted as a flash of pain flitted over his face. Then his jaw hardened.

“Forgive me. I meant no offense.” He turned his head as if looking for a way out.

“Forgive me. I should not have ... Thank you for putting me on my guard. I am sure you meant well.” My cheeks were burning.

I didn’t wait for him to reply. I hurried to where Mrs. Drake and Millicent were waiting for me.