Page 86 of Castle of Refuge

“I am sure it was very disconcerting for you.”

“Do you think she will harm my students? Or Helena?”

“I don’t know, but she has only herself and her henchman. Your father and I have a lot of men between us, and my brothers will be arriving very soon for the ball and the wedding. That is a lot of trained men determined to find her and stop her.”

“I know, but...” Audrey’s eyes were filling with tears.

“Please don’t cry. I will protect you.” He put his arm around her where they sat on the cushioned bench side by side. She leaned into him, pressing her cheek against his chest.

“I am sorry. But... what if she succeeds in hurting someone? How will I forgive myself?”

“Forgive yourself? You have done nothing wrong. It is Maris who needs forgiveness, not you.”

“But what if she hurts someone just to avenge herself on me?” She was quiet for a moment. “Perhaps we should postpone the wedding, just until she’s caught. Is it too late to tell the guests not to come?”

He felt a stab straight into his heart. “Do you not want to get married?”

“I do, I do.”

Was she crying? She was clinging to his shirt, her body turned toward him on the bench.

“I want to marry you, very much.” Her voice kept cracking. “I am just afraid of what is going to happen. She has ruinedeverything that seemed good in my life. And she seems so determined to hurt me. She wants me to suffer. And you and I both know she is capable of violent and despicable things. I couldn’t bear it if something happened, if someone else was harmed because I was too selfish to give up a little bit of my happiness. But I don’t want to hurt you either.”

She began to sob quietly, almost silently, her body shaking.

He held her as tightly as he could.God, give me the words to say.He wanted her to trust him, to believe that he could keep her and everyone else safe. But she obviously didn’t. And how could he blame her? They had both nearly been killed, only saved by his brother and her father and his men. And as far as he knew, her father was still out looking for Maris.

The sobbing subsided as she began to sniff and take deep breaths.

“I don’t want to, but if we postpone the ball and the wedding for a short time, perhaps Maris will be caught by then, do you not think?”

“Yes, I think that is very possible, but what if she is not caught? Should we postpone the wedding again? I do not like the idea that we are giving her what she wants. She has had far too much power over you for too long.”

Audrey pulled away, wiping at her face with her hands. “You are probably right. I just don’t want to see anyone get hurt.”

“And I think it may be too late to stop the guests from arriving. The invitations were sent a few days ago. The ball is in five days, the wedding in six.”

They were both silent as she rested against his chest.

“But if you wish to postpone the wedding, I will certainly honor that and do my best to prevent the guests from coming.” He said the words quietly and sincerely, even though they seemed to tear his heart in two.

“No. No, I don’t wish to postpone the wedding. I was just giving in to fear. I was so afraid that you marrying me, you loving me, was too good to be true. But I don’t want to wait any longer than we have to. I want to live with you and love you and be your wife as soon as possible.”

“Let us not worry. I will send men to make sure Helena is safe—and I will have them bring her here for the ball.”

“I would like that very much.” Her face brightened.

“Let us have faith that Maris will be found and all will be well. Indeed, she could be found and captured this very night.” He was putting every effort into assuring her that Maris would be apprehended. But if he was honest with himself, he’d had the same thoughts she was expressing.

God, help me find Maris and get her somewhere she cannot harm anyone.It would be too cruel to have to postpone the wedding because a woman was so jealous of her sister that she would do anything to hurt her.

***

The next day a letter came for Audrey. Edwin paid the courier and looked with concern as Audrey opened it.

“It is from the abbess of the convent where Maris was living.” Audrey commenced to read it out loud.

The Honorable Audrey of Engleford,