Page 124 of Haunting the Deep

Jaxon catches my eye from the drink table. He’s with Dillon, and they’re both laughing so hard that Dillon is wiping at his eyes. I smile at Jaxon and he nods at me.

“Are you positive you’re okay with all thisTitanicstuff?” Alice asks, studying my face.

I must look a little emotional. It’s hard to be here and not miss Ada and Mollie, my aunt and uncle, and all the others. To know the fate so many of the passengers suffered, how little chance most of them had of surviving. And yet, I know how lucky I am to have met them at all. “Yeah. I really am okay with it.”

“If you say so,” Alice says, but her tone is doubtful. She’s been by my side all evening. I half think she’s guarding me.

I turn to her. “Are you?”

“Am I what?”

“Okay?” There is something quieter about her since this whole thing happened.

She exhales. “Truth? I don’t know. It was a close call, Sam. I didn’t see what you guys saw about Niki and Blair. And I missed Matt entirely.”

“I missed him, too.”

“Yeah, but you had a spell on you not to recognize him. What’s my excuse?”

I shake my head. “Alice, don’t do that.”

“It’s hard not to.”

“I’m serious. Don’t do it. I did that with Vivian. Twisted it through my mind over and over. I hated myself.”

Alice’s eyes are strained, like she wants to believe me but can’t quite.

“And when I couldn’t come to terms with it, I tried to push it away. Bury the whole thing. Vivian, magic, you guys…everything.” I pause. “You were actually the one who helped me stop. Did you know that?”

She lifts a surprised eyebrow. “When I yelled at you?”

“When you told me that I had the opportunity to do something and that I was being selfish.”

“You were.”

I smile. Leave it to Alice to insult me while I’m trying to cheer her up. “I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said these past couple of days.”

“About teaching me how to see spirits?” Her icy blue eyes brighten.

“About getting over myself anddoingsomething. When you got that message from your bones, you knew something horrible was coming. You came to me. But I was too stuck in my own head, worrying about my own problems.”

Alice nods in agreement, but not in a judgmental way.

“There I was, watching Matt repeat the injustice of what had happened to all those spirits. Noticing how the accounts we were reading left out Ada and Mollie and so many others. And yet I didn’t understand my role in it. I couldn’t see what you and Redd could see, that something had to be done. Andwhat wound up happening? Matt manipulated me and those spirits for his own agenda. Vivian, Matt. I’m not gonna let that happen again. It’s time for me to make my own decisions about what I do with my magic, about who I want tobe.”

“Like helping dead people pass on?”

“Exactly.” I take a good look at Alice. “It’s up to us, isn’t it? That’s what you were trying to tell me that day you yelled at me. It’s up to us to make sure this doesn’t keep happening.”

She smiles. A rare occurrence for her.

Mary bounces up to us, her curls in an elegant updo. “Oh no. Alice is smiling. What’s going on?”

Alice looks happier than I’ve seen her in days. “I think we’re starting a detective agency for the dead.”

Mary’s mouth opens. “I love it! We’ll be like Sherlock Holmes. The hats, the capes, the whole nine.”

I laugh.What did I get myself into?