Page 74 of Hexed Up

“Oh please,” Tiggie says. “Have you seen the man? I bet you can’t keep your grubby little fingers off him.”

“He’s very good looking,” Prim muses.

“Yes, although if you’d ever seen the merfolk out in the Caribbean, you’d really appreciate beauty,” Tiggie says.

I’m about to argue with her, although Minotaur’s nose-ring knows why, when the sound of shocked gasps ring out around the little hotel spa. There’s only me, my sisters, Cousin Nina, Cousin Eva, my mum, and Aunt Jane in here. But the gasps are still loud enough to catch my attention.

I wonder what’s happened now. Probably my mother’s found a toenail at the bottom of the swimming pool or a wad of hair in one of the drains. However, the expression on Tiggie’s face – her mouth falling so far open I can see her tonsils, and her eyebrows shooting right up to the top of her forehead – tells me it’s something worse.

“Oh jeez,” she mutters. “I take it back. He is the hottest man alive.”

I frown, not understanding what she’s talking about, and turn my head to see Mr Hottie sauntering into the spa. Luckily, he’s not wearing one of those tiny pairs of budgie smugglers, but he is wearing a tight pair of swimming shorts that leave about as much to the imagination as Tiggie’s bikini.

“Oh, stars alive,” I mutter, sinking low into the hot tub, right under the water, and wishing I could swim down the drainpipe.

What was I thinking with this stupid fake-dating business? What did I think was going to happen? Well, I certainlydidn’tthink he’d be parading around in a little pair of swimming trunks as if he were competing in a Mr Universe contest. And I didn’t think my heart would be thumping and my blood heating every time I looked at the man.

Tiggie grabs my arm and pulls me up to the surface.

“What are you doing?” she asks, examining my face for signs of insanity.

“Nothing,” I say, then gulp as Horatio reaches the hot tub and climbs down inside to join us.

“Why aren’t you at golf?” I blurt out.

We’ve done a few unspeakable things to each other now. Things that should have been strictly off the table. I’ve seen him in a wet T-shirt. I’ve seen him smear ointment on his flexed biceps. I’ve seen him all hot and bothered. I’ve seen his face between my thighs. I haven’t seen him with quite so little clothing on before, although I’ve imagined it several times. Lots of times. More times than I definitely should have.

“I don’t really like golf,” he explains. “So your dad said it would be fine for me not to join the men for golf and come to the spa instead.”

Curse my father. The next time I see him, I’ll definitely be hexing him too. Why does he have to be so accommodating and nice? If it were my mother, she’d insist that the boys stay together and the girls stay together, and that we follow the plan.

“You don’t like golf?” Tiggie giggles, practically fluttering her wet eyelashes at Horatio. “You’re a banker. I thought it was mandatory to like golf.”

“Exactly. I spend far too much of my time on a golf course with a load of – how would you Brits phrase it – wankers.”

“Wankers, bankers, same thing, aren’t they?” Tiggie teases.

“In most cases, yes.”

“You’re not a fan of your colleagues then?” I finally pipe up, finding my voice again.

He leans his head back against the side of the hot tub and closes his eyes. “Not really. I can’t say I love the job either. I think being a Magical Enforcement Officer sounds much more interesting and exciting.”

He opens his eyes, directing his comment at my older sister, whose skin flushes an even deeper shade of red. Does this man realise the effect he has on female capillaries?

“I guess it is interesting and exciting sometimes,” Prim concedes.

“Don’t play it down,” Tiggie tells her. “It’s really exciting. Do you know, two months ago, Prim was involved in a raid of illegal dragon smugglers.”

“Were you?” I say.

“Yes. But don’t tell Norman. I told him I was at a Rules and Regulations conference in Birmingham.”

“Ew,” I say, thinking that conference sounds worse than a migraine. Then, I pause and tilt my head to one side. “Why would you lie to Norman?”

Prim stands up suddenly in the hot tub. “I think Mum’s waving at me,” and then she hurries out of the water.

“What was that about?” I ask Tiggie when she’s gone.