Page 35 of Embrace

“Iknow. I know. Of course, you worry. But you’ve got school—”

“Don’t. Please don’t say that. Youalwayssay that.” My frustration threatens to boil over. “I’m here, right now, just tell me where you are. Let me help.”

She doesn’t say anything for a long time, but when she does, it fissures my heart. “This isn’t a quick weekend visit, Kian. I’ve been here for over a week. Please don’t make this harder than it already is.”

“Kiyomi—”

“I’m sorry. But it would be best if you went home.”

That’s where I thought I was.

“You’re sure?” I ask again, careful not to push this time because I’m not sure I could handle what she’d say if I insist.

“I’m sure. I’m sorry you came all this way. I’ll get her to call you as soon as I can.” Then the phone clicks. I don’t know how long I stay like that, listening to the dial tone, but it must be too long because a warm hand finds its way to the middle of my back and the smell of citrus fills my senses.

“Hey, I know a really good hot chocolate place downtown.”

Scarlett rubs light circles on my back, and only then do I notice the cold that’s seeped into my skin. The only spot that lights up is where she touches me.

We walk back to the car and I open her door before getting in the driver’s side. Watching the house disappear in my rearview feelswrong, and the farther we go, the more I feel stretched thin. I want to do something stupid like wait until they’re home.

It could be days. I don’t care.

“Is your mom okay?” Scarlett finally asks, sounding hesitant.

“I don’t know, but I’m sure Kiyomi will update me,” I say, though I know it’s a lie.

Scarlett types the name of the café into my phone, leading me into the city and to the tiny shop. There isn’t anywhere to sit, so we take our cups and head back to my car.

Frank Ocean plays on a quiet hum, and I watch her smile when she brings the warm cup to her lips. She stops midway, gesturing for me to lift my cup.

“Try it,” she urges, waiting until I do and mirroring my movements until the sweet and slightly salty chocolate warmth coats my tongue. I don’t know how long we sit there without exchanging another word, but the playlist cuts off before I realize our cups are empty.

It’s quiet when we’re back on the road, and I replay Kiyomi’s words over and over. She won’t let me help. I’ve barely spoken to my mom for more than ten minutes over the past four years. This isn’t how it was supposed to go.

“Thanks for the ride,” Scarlett says. I hadn’t realized we’d already made it to Iona House. She grabs her bag from where it’s been sitting by her feet and starts to exit the car. I rest my hand atop hers, making her turn back, her cherry-red hair falling loosely from her braid. I notice the lines under her eyes and the cracks of red veins in them, before she smiles with all the energy she always has.

She doesn’t let me speak, only squeezes my hand before stepping out of the car. I watch her walk away until my phone pings. Like a reflex, I check for my sister’s text, but it’s only the group chat. And before I know it, I’m going to my voicemail, clicking on the one I never deleted.

“Hi, son, I missed you—”

Rap, rap, rap.

I drop my phone in the center console, startled by the knock on my driver’s-side window. Scarlett stares up at me from where she stands on the pavement. I roll down the window.

“Do you wanna come inside?”

I blink at her.

“Not me—I mean in—like, in my dorm?” She squeezes her eyes shut and tries again. “Sierra’s at her parents’ place so it’s just me. You know what? You probably want to go home—”

“Okay.”

Her brown eyes brighten. “Yeah?”

I’m out of the car and in her dorm before I can even think twice. The dorm is small. They don’t have a kitchen, not even like the tiny one in Summer’s dorm. Here they’ve got a toaster, a coffeepot, and a kettle. There’s a mini fridge in one corner and a small couch on the other wall. Sierra’s room is on the right side of the front door, judging by the huge gym bag laying in front of it.

“This is where the magic happens,” Scarlett says. “By that, I mean studying.”