Page 119 of Embrace

“Hot as usual.”

I toss the last corner piece of my toast at his head and head out for class.

Research Methods, Abnormal Psychology, Advanced Stats, and two first-year sociology electives isn’t the worst course pile, but it is when Research Methods take up most of my time, so I’m just putting together scraps for the latter classes.

But I’m apparently great at bullshitting my papers because when I get to my sociology class, I’ve aced it. It helps that the professor hands out A’s like Tic Tacs. It also helps that she loves hockey, and wants the captain to be stress-free this season.

When my lectures are over, I’m already desperate to see Scarlett, but I stop by our local flower shop first.

I text the group chat a picture and they all chime in with their suggestions.

The florist gives me a weird look, but creates the bouquet.

I’m jittery when someone lets me into Iona, and I’m walking to her door.

On the first floor, most of the doors are open for moral support during exam season.

So I walk into her dorm, and find Scarlett’s sitting on the floor, papers spread out in front of her, hair in a messy braid, glasses on, wearing a loose oversize T-shirt. It slips off her shoulder, showing some of her tattoos.

“I think we need a new rule,” I say, getting her to turn her head toward me.

Her smile is immediate, and then, as if realizing something, it dampens. “What do you mean?”

I place the flowers on the couch, just wanting to focus on herright now. I don’t like that something is making her smile dip off her face.

“No leaving without a goodbye kiss.”

Her gaze drops, inching up again to look up at me but this time with guilt hanging on her features. “I’m sorry. You were asleep, and I didn’t want to bother you.”

I crouch and move some papers out of the way. “You think you bother me?”

She shakes her head.

“Okay. So tell me the real reason you left.”

“I—”

“And don’t say to study. I know your next test is two weeks from now, and you finished all your assignments last week.”

“But I do need to study. See?” She gestures to her papers. She does this a lot, studying when she’s trying not to think of what’s bothering her.

I sigh, pulling her braid over her shoulder and undoing it for her. She watches me, biting hard on her lip, realizing she can’t lie to me. Not when she has so many tells.

“I told you I’m not good at this,” she says.

“Good at what, sweetheart?”

“Being a girlfriend. Not doing stupid things like leaving in the middle of the night after you were nothing but sweet to me.”

“So why did you do it?”

She opens her mouth like she’s going to explain but thinks better of it. “I don’t know.”

“Let me help you then. Because this is what happens in relationships. You get to tell me what’s on your mind, and I get to unravel it for you.”

“But who’s doing that for you? I’ve only added more to everything you’re already dealing with. Relationships are supposed to be easy. Like the ones your friends have. I’ve seen the way you look atthem. You want something like that, Kian, not some girl who puts herself in positions that only upset you.”

“Are you kidding? You should have seen my friends when they first got together. That shit was a mess, and you know what? Istilllooked at them that way. I want all of it, Scarlett, all the mess, however much you want to give me.”