Page 65 of (Mostly) Human Resources

“Did you pack food?” it asked.

The Jackalope was, thankfully, staying on its side of the fire. She tried not to think about how long it had been following them to be able to almost perfectly emulate Nic’s voice. It was, admittedly, quite disturbing to see its mouth drop open and hear a distinctly human voice come out. Nothing in her reports from her Wardens could have prepared her for that level of strange.

“Are you hungry?” Alexys retrieved her purse from beside her to dig through it. “I’m not sure if I have anything you can eat.” She looked up from the bag and froze.

The creature’s mouth unzipped before her eyes. Flesh split along a jagged line of bleeding skin from one side of its skull to the other until it was nearly split in half. Its jaw dropped open to reveal rows upon rows of gnarled, razorsharp teeth and a saliva-dripping tongue that was far too long for a normal rabbit. Red eyes gleamed malicious and hungry in the firelight.

Alexys shrieked and threw herself backward as the demonic rabbit launched itself at her. She scrambled back, screaming for Nic, trying to find anything she could use to defend herself. She’d managed to move her hand just in time to see the Jackalope’s salivating jaws snap shut over her purse. Its red eyes glimmered with such malice that Alexys couldn’t help the whimper that slipped past her lips.

It grinned at her, she swore the beastgrinned, and then bounded away into the darkness, taking her purse with it. Alexys tipped forward, a belated and half-hearted attempt to grab her bag, but the creature was too fast. She landed roughly on both palms, staring open-mouthed after the Jackalope. Nic emerged from the depths of the cave, his eyes fixed where the creature vanished into the still falling rain.

“I take back what I said before,” Nic said, voice incredulous, arms crossed over his chest. “The Jackalope population increase mightnotbe an anomaly.”

Tears made Alexys’s vision swim. She’d just lost her purse, her wallet, her notebook, her house keysandthe keys to the rental car, as well as all the receipts from the trip. The Finance Department was going to own her ass for the nextcentury.She groaned and dropped her face into her hands. Things just kept going from bad to worse.

“They’re much larger than anticipated, as well,” Nic carried on. He looked down at her and asked, “Do you have a spare notepad? I’d like to write down my observations for future reference.”

Lifting her face from her hands, Alexys stared up at him, unable to fully understand what he was saying. A dull ringing started up in her ears, and her chest tightened.

Misunderstanding her expression, he explained, “I’d like to add them to the R&C research file on Jackalopes.”

“I don’t give a singular damn about your research, Dyre.” She pointed in the direction the Jackalope had vanished, her voice becoming louder and shriller as she spoke. “That demonic creature just unhinged its jaws like a snake andate my purse.”

Nic’s lips pressed into a thin line in what she hoped for his sake wasn’t an attempt to prevent laughter. “Well, that’s unfortunate.”

“Unfortunate?!” Alexys screeched as she launched to her feet. “My whole life was in that bag! Thank God my phone was in my pocket, or it would’ve eaten that, too!”

Nic took a step back and tried to joke, “I’m not sure they could eat a cell phone, that’s silly.”

That did it. That threw a gallon of gasoline on the proverbial fire inside her. She let a scream of frustration leak through her clenched teeth. Alexys shoved her hands into her hair, gripping the roots tightly to keep from throttling him.

“Of all the stupid, asinine—”

“Those are synonyms,” he pointed out.

“I’m going to strangle you!” Alexys must have looked serious because Nic took several quick steps out of arm’s reach. “In fact, maybe I should! The office would thank me for it.”

He put his hands on his hips like a disappointed mother. “I think you need to take a deep breath, Keane. I don’t like your tone.”

“And I don’t like your face,” she retorted. It was a blatant lie given how much she had been staring at his face just a few hours before, but it was the best she could come up with given her distress.

He had the audacity to roll his eyes. “That’s a weak comeback, even from you.”

“You really do bring out theworstin me!”

“Somehow, I don’t think I’ve truly seen your worst yet.” She wasn’t sure if that was supposed to be a compliment or an insult, so she settled on her default reaction to his every provocation: firing right back.

“You’re a heartless, egotistical bastard, Dyre,” she spat.

“On the contrary, I think you like my overwhelming confidence, Keane.” Nic started to walk around the fire toward her. Really, it was more of a prowl, but she didn’t want to look at him. “And I’ll tell you what else. I think you enjoy taking your anger out on me.”

“If you know what’s good for you, Dyre, you’ll stay on that side of the fire,” Alexys growled.

He smiled. “Or what? We both know you’re all bark and no bite.”

You’re insufferable!” She threw her hands up in exasperation.

“Wait, Keane, you’re bleeding,” Nic said, any hint of teasing vanishing. Alexys looked down at hands, which were, in fact, bleeding.