Page 337 of Once Upon a Fable

I loved her, and that was the worst thing I could ever do.

I buried my face in my hands.

Why?

Why did this have to happen?

Why did she have to find me? Care for me? Be so goddamn perfect?

How was I supposed to say goodbye after weeks of admitting there was no way in hell I could ever let her go? How could my thoughts suddenly flip from selfishness to doing the right thing?

Schizophrenic, Kas.

I groaned.

No, I didn’t think this was a symptom of psychosis. This was just me. A product of doing whatever it took to keep those I loved safe.

I’d condemned myself to a childhood of rape and abuse, taking as much pain as I could to shelter those I loved. And now, now I finally had a chance at being happy with someone strong enough to stand up to me, and I couldn’t allow her to stay.

I wouldn’t.

Because if I did...she’d die.

Because of me.

All my prior possession slipped away.

She wasn’t mine to keep.

She wasnevermine to keep.

I swallowed hard, rubbing my temples to ease my constant headache.

She had to go.

There was no other option for her.

Because I fucking love her.

And I won’t hurt her again.

I swallowed another groan, forcing myself to keep walking. I’d been up for the past hour, patroling the hallways of Fables, skulking in the shadows, hunting bastards who might hurt the woman I’d fallen head over fucking heels in love with.

That was my sole purpose now.

To guard her, watch over her, protect her from everything...including me.

I shuddered as I cut through the rear of the house, padding barefoot past the laundry and surveillance room. What happened in the garden returned to haunt me. How incredible it’d been to sink inside her while pinning her against the wall. How she’d kissed me back. How she’dreacted to my touch, my tongue, my everything.

She’d made me feel wanted.

Real.

I remembered now.

I remembered who I’d been when I’d had a family to care for.

I remembered how nothing was more important than their welfare.