Page 167 of Heal Me, Love Me

Something dark flashed across his face. “Your mouth always seems to get you into trouble.”

I angled closer, my lips brushing his ear. “Keep thinking about my mouth. I’m sure it’ll help you focus tomorrow.”

He came forward another inch, and our chests collided as tension filled the air around us. The crowd erupted. “Fuck you,” he spat as two officials wedged themselves between us, pushing us apart before the photo op could turn into a physical altercation. He didn’t look away as we were held back from each other.

Neither did I.

During our fight, no one would be standing between us.

No trash talk.

No rules beyond those inside the cage.

Finally, everything would be settled.

“Keaton.” Coach Phil’s hand settled on my shoulder, pulling me back to reality.

Security guided Rowan and me in opposite directions while camera flashes followed us across the stage and the announcer hyped tomorrow’s event. Somewhere behind us, fans were cheering, convinced they’d just seen exactly what they came for.

Maybe they had, because to them, we were just two fighters who had a problem with each other that the promotion was playing up.

I wished it were that simple.

I followed Coach Phil through the backstage area, barely noticing anything because my mind was still out on the stage, stuck on Rowan.

“Hell of a face-off,” one of the promotion staff said as we passed.

Coach Phil grunted. “That’s one way to put it.”

The guy laughed and kept walking.

I replayed the weigh-in in my head as we made our way toward the locker room: Rowan stepping off the scale. The look on his face when I told him we could finally settle everything. And the anger beneath every word he spoke.

By the time we reached the locker room, my stomach was in knots. I dropped into a folding chair as Coach Phil discussed schedules and arrival times with another coach. Normally, I would’ve listened in. I’d be focused on preparation, strategy, and everything I needed to do before stepping into the cage. This time, I found myself staring at the floor.

For months, Rowan and I’d been trapped in the same nightmare. Life pulled us in different directions, and we tried tocope. I made it worse, then tried to convince myself I was doing the right thing, even though neither of us seemed able to walk away completely. The breakup was supposed to make things easier. At least that’s what I’d thought. I was supposed to stop feeling torn between him and everything else. He was supposed to have the freedom to chase the opportunities he’d worked for his entire life. We were both supposed to move on. Instead, we’d spent months miserable—at least I had.

A humorless chuckle escaped me before I could stop it.

“What’s funny?” Coach Phil asked.

I looked up and shook my head. “Nothing.”

There was nothing funny about it. In less than thirty hours, Rowan and I would be locked in a cage to fight each other in front of thousands of people, and no one understood what was actually on the line.

Tomorrow, one of us would leave with a win, but I had a feeling we’d both walk away having lost even more.

Adrenaline coursedthrough me as I stood backstage, waiting for the announcer to call my name. In the next few minutes, the only thing that would matter was what happened inside the cage. Coach Phil finished wrapping my hands as one of the commission officials reviewed the final paperwork. Around us, people moved in and out of the room, checking my gloves, confirming I had my mouthguard, and handling everything that had to happen before I walked out. The entire process felt familiar, which was probably the only reason I wasn’t pacing a hole in the floor.

“You good?” Coach Phil asked.

I wanted to say yes. I wanted to tell him this was just another fight, that once the cage door closed, nothing else mattered, but that would’ve been a lie because I was getting ready to face the person who’d been the most important part of my life for years. If I let myself think about it too long, I could admit he probably still was.

That’d always been the problem with Rowan. Loving him had been the easiest thing I’d ever done, but figuring out how to keep him had been the hard part.

But I couldn’t tell Coach all of that, so instead I nodded.

The lie must’ve been obvious, because he didn’t look convinced. “You’ve done the work. Trust it.”