Page 115 of Heal Me, Love Me

I stared at the message for a second because part of me wanted to explain. I wanted to tell her about my injury, the emergency room, and the past two weeks I’d spent frustrated and stuck on the sidelines while everyone else kept training. I wanted to tell her I’d finally gotten rid of the sling today, because somehow that felt important. Instead, I hit send on what I’d already typed.

Her reply came less than a minute later:

Seriously?!? I wish you’d told me sooner. Now I have to find someone else!

Of course, she didn’t ask what happened or seem to care at all, except for how it would affect her.

I set the phone face down on the counter and wrapped both hands around the coffee mug Dawn had quietly set in front of me while I was staring at my phone. The warmth seeped into my palms, but it didn’t ease the hollow feeling settling inside me.

I’d had a great Thanksgiving with Rowan’s family the day before. I’d spent the morning getting good news from Audrey, and Rowan would be back soon. A couple of text messages shouldn’t ruin my day, but it wasn’t really about the text messages. It was about the part of me that kept hoping things with my mom would be different. No matter how many times my mother showed me who she was, I still held onto some stupid little piece of hope that the next conversation would be better.

“Everything all right?”

I looked up to find Dawn leaning against the counter, watching me with a soft expression on her face.

“My mom texted.”

“And whatever she said wasn’t good?”

“Does my face give me away that badly?”

“Yes, sweetheart. It does.”

“She was with her fiancé’s family yesterday. Apparently, they were discussing their wedding, and she forgot to tell me she was getting married in two weeks.”

Dawn blinked. “Two weeks? Didn’t you get an invitation?”

“Nope, but she wanted to know if I could still bartend at her reception.”

“She wants you to work the wedding?”

I nodded. “Yeah, but I told her I got hurt and couldn’t do it.”

“And?”

I huffed out a laugh. “Now she’s mad because she has to find somebody else.”

Dawn closed her eyes briefly, then took a slow sip of coffee.

“It’s fine,” I said, not wanting her sympathy.

“No. It’s not.”

I looked away. “Maybe not, but it’s normal for her.”

“That doesn’t make it okay.”

I knew she was right, but there was nothing I could do about it. “My mom’s always been like this.” I shrugged, then immediately regretted it as my shoulder protested. “I don’t know why I keep expecting something different.”

“Because she’s your mother.” Dawn set her mug down and crossed her arms. “I didn’t know everything when you were younger.”

My head lifted. “What do you mean?”

She hesitated for a second. “I knew things weren’t easy; your parents weren’t exactly good at hiding theirissuesfrom the neighborhood.”

That was probably the nicest way anyone had ever described their relationship.

“I didn’t know all the details,” she continued. “But I knew there were days when you didn’t want to go home.”