I swallowed. “I’ll try not to.”
“Good girl.”
The words went through me like a spark.
I hated my body. I hated the soft little pull of need that answered him, how some reckless part of me wanted to hear those words again under very different circumstances. I hated that Jules would have read the moment perfectly and then made a joke so obscene I would have needed to lie down. I hated that Callum was looking at me as if he could see far more than I had given him permission to see.
Then his gaze dipped to my mouth. It was only for a second.
But it still happened.
I stopped breathing. He looked back to my eyes immediately, and something in his face closed, almost like a man shutting a door inside himself before he could see what was on the other side.
“You should go inside,” he said.
I nodded too quickly. “Right. Yes. Nine tomorrow.”
“Nine tomorrow.”
I opened the car door before I could wait for him to do it, which was probably both childish and self-preserving. The cool night air hit my face. I stepped onto the sidewalk, turned back, and found him watching me from the dim interior of the car.
“Goodnight, Callum,” I said.
“Goodnight, Avery.”
I closed the door.
The car did not pull away until I was inside the building. I felt his eyes on me while I fumbled my key into the lock, opened the door, and pushed into the dim lobby. Only when the door shut behind me did I exhale. My knees felt unreliable. My skin felt too tight. Every place he had not touched me seemed aware of the omission. I felt the disappointment of every one of those too-numerous places. Once I made it inside my apartment, I dropped my purse onto the counter, leaned back against the closed door, and pressed both hands over my face.
My phone buzzed.
Jules:Are you alive?
I laughed once, weakly. How could she possibly have known I had just walked in the door?
Me:Physically.
Jules:Emotionally?
Me:Contested.
Jules: Sexually?
I closed my eyes.
Me:I’m not answering that.
Jules:So no, but in a hot way.
Me:He was a gentleman.
Jules:Tragic.
Me:Jules.
Jules:Define gentleman.
Me:He bought me a chocolate tart and talked about my parents and told me work needs distance tomorrow.